Monday, January 7, 2013

Paws & Claws ~ December 10, 2012 ~ How cold is it where you live? Still 50's here

It is better to remain silent
and be thought a fool

than to speak
and remove all doubt.

~ Abraham Lincoln
2012 December
See Explanation.  Clicking on the picture will download  the highest resolution version available.
In the Center of Saturn's North Polar Vortex
Image Credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech/Space Science Institute
Explanation: What's happening at the north pole of Saturn? A vortex of strange and complex swirling clouds. The center of this vortex was imaged in unprecedented detail last week by the robotic Cassini spacecraft orbiting Saturn. These clouds lie at the center of the unusual hexagonal cloud system that surrounds the north pole of Saturn. Saturn's north pole precessed into sunlight just a few years ago, with Cassini taking only infrared images of the shadowed region previously. The above image is raw and unprocessed and is being prepared for release in 2013. Several similar images of the region have recently been condensed into a movie. Planetary scientists are sure to continue to study this most unusual cloud formation for quite some time.
Time-Lapse: A Total Solar Eclipse
Video Credit & Copyright: Colin Legg
Explanation: Have you ever experienced a total eclipse of the Sun? The above time-lapse movie depicts such an eclipse in dramatic detail as visible from Australia last month. As the video begins, a slight dimming of the Sun and the surrounding Earth is barely perceptible. Suddenly, as the Moon moves to cover nearly the entire Sun, darkness sweeps in from the left -- the fully blocked part of the Sun. At totality, only the bright solar corona extends past the edges of the Moon, and darkness surrounds you. Distant horizons are still bright, though, as they are not in the darkest part of the shadow. At mid-totality the darkness dips to the horizon below the eclipsed Sun, created by the shadow cone -- a corridor of shadow that traces back to the Moon. As the total solar eclipse ends -- usually after a few minutes -- the process reverses and Moon's shadow moves off to the other side. Solar eclipses can frequently be experienced at gatherings organized along the narrow eclipse path as well as specialized cruises and plane flights.
See Explanation.  Clicking on the picture will download  the highest resolution version available.
The Astronaut Who Captured a Satellite
Image Credit: STS-51A, NASA
Explanation: In 1984, high above the Earth's surface, an astronaut captured a satellite. It was the second satellite captured that mission. Pictured above, astronaut Dale A. Gardnerflies free using the Manned Maneuvering Unit and begins to attach a control device dubbed the Stinger to the rotating Westar 6 satellite. Communications satellite Westar 6 had suffered a rocket malfunction that left it unable to reach its intended high geosynchronous orbit. Both the previously caught Palapa B-2 satellite and the Westar 6 satellite were guided into the cargo bay of the Space Shuttle Discovery and returned to Earth. Westar 6 was subsequently refurbished and sold.
Calvin is just too smart for his own good. Who else would go after Santa Claus for labor laws and tax breaks? Maybe it is because the US just had it's big election, but I think this may be the strategy a few politicians - regardless of country or party affiliation.
Seriously, Calvin and Hobbes has got to go down in history as one of the greatest comic strips of all time. Do you agree? What others would you guys suggest?
For the Festival of World Cultures in August 2008, street painter Edgar Mueller transformed the East Pier in Dún Laoghaire, Ireland, into an ice-age crevasse.
"Beside the personal messages, questions and sometimes answers in my paintings I'm questioning the experienced daily perception of people by changing the appearance of public places," he says.

British Boy Scouts consider atheist’s version of the Scout Promise

The Boy Scout movement in Britain is considering creating a version of its oath that would allow atheists to become full members. U.K. Scouting said it is surveying its members on the change, a process known as consultation.
The organization has allowed members of other religions for the past 40 years to change the language of the Scout Oath by substituting the appropriate religious name. Muslims, for example, take the oath in the name of Allah.
We are a values-based movement and exploring faith and religion will remain a key element of the Scouting program,” said Wayne Bulpitt, the chief commissioner for scouting in Britain. “That will not change. However, throughout our 105-year history, we have continued to evolve so that we remain relevant to communities across the U.K…”
All scout organizations use a variation of the original Scout Promise or Oath: “On my honor I promise that I will do my best — to do my duty to God and the King (or to God and my Country); to help other people at all times; and to obey the Scout Law.”
In Britain, scouts who are not British citizens can substitute “the country I live in” for the queen.
Way too sensible and timely to receive consideration in the Boy Scouts of America.
Thanks Ed
Some things are just more important….
This guy has his priorities in the right order.
Shoot now finish the paperwork later
You can always finish the paperwork later.
In case you missed it, here's my own re-telling of the Superman story: NPR's Morning Edition {Audio: 7min]
Celebrate Health from

From workout gear to kitchen gadgets and even a deluxe treadmill desk, we've scoured stores to bring you 20 healthy gift ideas that are guaranteed to make the people on your list feel good, inside and out.

Take these easy steps to avoid piling on the pounds

Good for the planet, your diet, and your soul

How to erase circles, banish wrinkles, and get an all around glow
Mediterranean Hummus
2 15-ounce cans low-sodium garbanzo beans (chickpeas), drained and rinsed
½ cup lemon juice
2 teaspoons garlic minced from jar
1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
¼ teaspoon paprika
½ teaspoon dried parsley
  1. Place all ingredients in a blender or food processor and blend until smooth.
  2. Serve with veggie slices or sticks as a dip.
Dutch traders
The name "Dutch Trader" refers to The Golden Age. This was a period in Dutch history, roughly spanning the 17th century, in which Dutch trade, science, military and art were among the most acclaimed in the world.

Dutch ships hunted whales off Svalbard, traded spices in India and Indonesia (via the Dutch East India Company) and founded colonies in New Amsterdam (now New York), South Africa and the West Indies. In addition some Portuguese colonies were conquered, namely in Northeastern Brazil, Angola, Indonesia and Ceylon. This new nation flourished culturally and economically, creating what historian Simon Schama has called an "embarrassment of riches". Speculation in the tulip trade led to a first stock market crash in 1637, but the economic crisis was soon overcome.

In 1602 the Dutch East India Company was founded. It was the first-ever multinational corporation, financed by shares that established the first modern stock exchange. This company received a Dutch monopoly on Asian trade and would keep this for two centuries. It became the world's largest commercial enterprise of the 17th century. Spices were imported in bulk and brought huge profits, due to the efforts and risks involved and seemingly insatiable demand. To finance the growing trade within the region, the Bank of Amsterdam was established in 1609, the precursor to, if not the first true central bank.
Dutch Traders Blend Coffee
I used to make my own Dutch Traders Blend, based on the coffee made at my local coffee shop in Manhattan Beach in the 80's. The blend was:
1/3 Sumatra: Sumatra is one of the great romance coffees of the world. It is not simply that the Indonesian island of Sumatra embodies a Conradian romance of the unfamiliar. When it is at its best the coffee itself suggests intrigue, with its complexity, its weight without heaviness, and an acidity that resonates deep inside the heart of the coffee, enveloped in richness, rather than confronting the palate the moment we lift the cup.
1/3 Celebes Kolassi: The Indonesian island of Sulawesi, formerly Celebes, spreads like a huge four-fingered hand in the middle of the Malay Archipelago. The Sulawesi coffee comes from a mountainous region near the base of the southwestern finger of the island. The region and the coffee, Toraja, are named after the colorful indigenous people of the region. The coffee is also called Kalossi, after a regional market town. Whether we call it Sulawesi Toraja or Celebes Kalossi, coffee from this region can range from a plantation grown, wet-processed coffee with a smooth, vibrant but relatively low-acid, medium-bodied profile to small-grower coffees that resemble the Mandheling coffees of Sumatra (they are deep, resonant, and pungently complex in the lower registers).
1/3 Mocha-Java: Traditionally, a blend of Yemen Mocha and Java Arabica coffees, usually one part Yemen Mocha and two parts Java Arabica. In its traditional form, Mocha-Java is the world's oldest coffee blend.
Dutch Trader Blend
Experience Dutch Trader blended coffee and reminisce the trials, tribulations, and the inspirational spirit of the Dutch Coffee Trader. Indonesian coffee is distinguished by an essence of earthiness that provides a full body, a rich flavor, and a delightfully vibrant acidity; add to that the medium body and brilliancy of the African bean. This blend is worthy of the treacherous journey traders once sailed. CoffeeAM uses high-quality Arabica beans to bring you the quality you have been looking for and a blend better than you ever dreamed. Dutch Trader blended coffee makes an intriguing evening coffee and is a perfect way to celebrate the end of a beautiful day.
The Dutch Trader Blend is a combination of Indonesian coffees that possess the essence of earthiness to provide a full body and rich flavor. Medium roasted, this blend has a vibrant acidity, but contains a light brightness in the finish.
In 1968 British police constable David Morris was directing Vincent Fagan to a parking space when Fagan's car ran onto his foot. Morris shouted at him to move the car, but Fagan refused and turned off the ignition. Eventually he started it again and moved off, but he was convicted of assault for the incident.
This raises a curious legal point. Fagan had rolled onto Morris' foot by accident, and his "assault" consisted of sitting passively in his car. The guilty act carried no guilty intent, and the guilty intent accompanied no guilty act. Don't the two have to occur together in order to constitute a crime?
No, they don't, ruled the English court of appeal. Fagan's action became criminal when he resolved not to move while the constable's foot was pinned under his tire. A dissenting judge objected that simply sitting in a car shouldn't be construed as a guilty act, but Fagan's appeal was dismissed.
(Fagan v Metropolitan Police Commissioner [1969] 1 QB 439)
It is the duty of Israeli leaders to explain to public opinion, clearly and courageously, a certain number of facts that are forgotten with time. The first of these is that there is no Zionism, colonialization or Jewish State without the eviction of the Arabs and the expropriation of their lands.
--Yoram Bar Porath, Yediot Aahronot, of 14 July 1972

Spirit the penniless population across the frontier by denying it employment... Both the process of expropriation and the removal of the poor must be carried out discreetly and circumspectly.
--Theodore Herzl, founder of the World Zionist Organization, speaking on Arabs in Palestine, Complete Diaries, 6/12/1895

Zionist colonization must either be terminated or carried out against the wishes of the native [Arab] population. This colonization can, therefore, be continued and make progress only under the protection of a power independent of the native population - an iron wall, which will be in a position to resist the pressure to the native population.
This is our policy towards the Arabs...
--Vladimir Jabotinsky, The Iron Wall, 1923
One has to have a foot in two widely separated generations to appreciate this fully.
We have to kill all the Palestinians unless they are resigned to live here as slaves.
--Chairman Heilbrun of the Committee for the Re-election of General Shlomo Lahat, the mayor of Tel Aviv, October 1983

When we have settled the land, all the Arabs will be able to do about it will be to scurry around like drugged cockroaches in a bottle. --Raphael Eitan, Chief of Staff of the Israeli Army, New York Times, 14 April 1983

First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out because I was not a socialist. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist. Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak out for me.
~ Martin Niemoller, German anti-Nazi

"He hasn't an enemy in the world - but all his friends hate him."
- Eddie Cantor

"Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong."
- Oscar Wilde

"I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it."
- Harry S. Truman

"Police in Georgia are looking for people who stole 400,000 toothpicks from a warehouse. Fortunately, one of the suspects has a clear alibi; a tiny piece of spinach in his teeth." -Jimmy Fallon

"China is now expected to surpass Japan as the 2nd richest country in the world. They could become the richest, but that's only if we pay them the money we owe them, and that's not going to happen." -Jay Leno

"In a survey of 35 cities, Los Angeles ranked second-to-last in intelligence. Residents of L.A. were outraged after the report was slowly explained to them." -Conan O'Brien

The day I knew my in-laws had finally accepted me:

As we pulled into their driveway, my father-in-law was on the phone. "Oh, I have to run," he told the person on the other end. "My daughter-in-law and her husband just arrived."


I was preparing lunch for my granddaughter when the phone rang. "If you can answer one easy trivia question," a young man said, "you'll win ten free dance lessons!"

Before I could tell him I was not interested he continued, "You'll be a lucky winner if you can tell me what Alexander Graham Bell invented."

"I don't know," I replied dryly, trying to discourage him.

"What are you holding in your hand right now?" he asked excitedly.

"A bologna sandwich."

"Congratulations!" he yelled. "And for having such a great sense of humor..."

If you thought the woman from last week who never told her husband of 19 years that she used to be a man was bad, wait until you hear this little escapade.

When you get involved in a new relationship the conversation about former lovers is always an awkward one. Some people never have it, but usually the subject comes up at one point or another.

It did for one Arizona man who thought he had really scored with an attractive young woman named Brittany. The two started dating in March or April and the relationship seemed to be going great until things started to slow down physically later in the year. That is when Brittany approached her boyfriend about some different kinds of activities.

He expected Brittany to ask if they could have a threesome or if he wanted to be a swinging couple, but that is not what Brittany started to show him on the Internet. Instead, Brittany started to show him pictures of people having sex with animals. She told him that she was interested and in having sex with dogs. She went on to tell him that she has been having sex with their family dogs since she was 13 years old.

The now ex-boyfriend told police he was "disturbed and freaked out" and said he told Brittany "she was disgusting." The two broke up shortly thereafter.

The ex, whose name has been edited from the police report, said Brittany seemed, "like a nice, sweet and innocent girl."
To make matters even more complicated he also suspects Brittany is pregnant with his child.
She was arrested and charged with two counts of "crime against nature" which I didn't even know was a thing.
Imagine explaining that one on a job interview when you're potential boss asks you when you have a conviction for.
Do you recall the biggest moneymaking films of the past year? Mental_floss challenges you in today's Lunchtime Quiz. Can you name the top-grossing movies of 2012, according to Box Office Mojo’s leaderboard in 5 minutes? THe picture here is a gimme, but the rest may be difficult! Link
Swedish town seeks to protect straw goat

GAVLE, Sweden - A Swedish city is employing private security to protect its traditional four-story-tall straw goat from arsonists. Wellington Ikuobase, who was elected Gavle Resident of The Year and was in charge of christening this year's 42 1/2-foot-tall goat, said someone tried to light it on fire Saturday prior to its official inauguration, The reported Monday. "The front hoof smells of petrol," organizer Eje Berglund said at the Sunday inauguration. The goat has been a popular target for vandals and arsonists in recent years. The city, which first adopted the Christmas goat tradition in 1966, has hired private security guards to protect the straw sculpture.

Q and A Quickies

Q: What's the biggest moth in the world?
A: A Mammoth!

Q: Did you hear about the elephant with diarrhea?
A: It's all over town.

QUOTE: "The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes."

HINT: (1871-1922), French novelist, critic, and essayist.

ANSWER: Marcel Proust.

Some Holiday spirit, from across the world in Selangor, Malaysia. Marvelous.
deadly handsome men
Thanks Cindy

In January 1959, the USSr launched the first craft intended to come in contact with the moon, called Mechta. Unfortunately, the astronomers' calculations were off, and the craft missed its mark by about 5,000 miles. Two months later, the United States attempted a similar stunt with the Pioneer IV. It, too, failed to reach the moon.

In 2004, the Messenger probe blasted off, hoping to become the first spacecraft to orbit Mercury in 2011. Mercury's orbit speed, small size, and proximity to the sun makes it incredibly complicated to plot a "slingshot" route that will allow for the proper speed and angle to enter the planet's orbit.

High winds and miscommunication caused Soyuz 23 to land in a frozen lake, where it broke through the ice and dragged its two cosmonaut occupants to the bottom. Divers located the craft and connected it via cables to a helicopter, which dragged it to shore. Thanks to their own survival instincts, the two men inside were retrieved alive.

In 1959, the Soviet spacecraft Lunik 3 transmitted to Earth photographs of something never previously seen by human eyes: images from the far side of the moon.

The Soviet Mars I space probe was headed to the red planet in early 1963 when it suddenly fell silent about 66 million miles into its journey. It is now believed that mechanical problems caused the failure, but at the time, many were convinced that Martians had attacked or otherwise disabled the craft in order to avoid detection.

When the United States launched the Pioneer 6 in December 1965, the craft was sent out to orbit the sun and had an expected life span of six months. Incredibly, contact was made with Pioneer 6 as recently as the year 2000, and parts of it are still thought to be functioning even today.

NASA-NOAA Satellite Reveals New Views of Earth at Nigh

Driving school for dogs in New Zealand

The canine driving school is aimed at proving how intelligent the animals can be.
Monty the giant schnauzer is among the novice drivers who have learned to control the brakes, gears and steering wheel.
Thanks Ed
The Truth About Wi-Fi
I don't know who created the graphic. -via Geeks Are Sexy
The fertility rate measures the number of births occurring per 1,000 women between the ages of 15-44 in a particular year. Tracking trends in fertility and birth rates is essential in planning for the current and future needs of multiple generations.

Random Facts:

In 2011, the birth rate for women ages 15 to 29 continued to decline across all age groups, following a small peak in 2007. The fertility rate for all U. S. women is now the lowest it has been since these data have been recorded.

While unemployment and a slow economy may have played a role in the recent fertility decline, actual physical infertility effects one in every six couples who are trying to conceive. In at least half of all cases of infertility a male factor is a major or contributing cause. This means that about 10% of all men in the United States who are attempting to conceive suffer from infertility.
This a picture of Seattle the day after they Legalized Marijuana...
Healthy Living from

Thinning hair, a fading smile, or a wrinkly neck can make you feel old even when
you're not. Guess what? You can fix those. Here's how to make the problems go
away, either at home or with a bit of help.

Hard-to-heal injuries and other signs of rheumatoid arthritis

You may be tired, but no one has to know it

Some are just annoying, others can make you switch
What's unusual about this sentence by Harry Mathews?
Once brought into this country, partly imprudent gray barbers marry expatriate, parrying the frictions of tried friends such as Mary, the sorry crook with no work at hand, who is now without a murmur getting pastry.
It remains a sentence when you remove the Rs:
Once bought into this county, patly impudent gay babes may expatiate, paying the fictions of tied fiends such as May, the soy cook with no wok at hand, who is now without a mumu getting pasty.
A new skinny, bug-eyed species of snake called Imantodes chocoensis has been discovered in the tropical region of Chocó, which lies on the Pacific coast of northern Ecuador, Colombia and Panama. The delicate reptiles are nocturnal and live in trees, where they use their disproportionately thin necks to fling their upper bodies effortlessly from branch to branch.
Read more in Becky Crew's latest blog for Scientific American magazine:
In 1908, while traveling in the northern Caucasus, Leo Tolstoy regaled a local tribe with tales of the greatest warriors and statesmen in history. When he had finished, the chief said, "But you have not told us a syllable about the greatest general and greatest ruler of the world. We want to know something about him. He was a hero. He spoke with a voice of thunder; he laughed like the sunrise, and his deeds were strong as the rock and as sweet as the fragrance of roses. The angels appeared to his mother and predicted that the son whom she would conceive would become the greatest the stars had ever seen. He was so great that he even forgave the crimes of his greatest enemies and shook brotherly hands with those who had plotted against his life. His name was Lincoln and the country in which he lived is called America, which is so far away that if a youth should journey to reach it he would be an old man when he arrived. Tell us of that man."
"I looked at them," Tolstoy recalled, "and saw their faces all aglow, while their eyes were burning. I saw that those rude barbarians were really interested in a man whose name and deeds had already become a legend."
Tolstoy reflected that this "little incident proves how largely the name of Lincoln is worshipped throughout the world and how legendary his personality has become. Now, why was Lincoln so great that he overshadows all other national heroes? ... [H]is supremacy expresses itself altogether in his peculiar moral power and in the greatness of his character. He had come through many hardships and much experience to the realization that the greatest human achievement is love. He was what Beethoven was in music, Dante in poetry, Raphael in painting, and Christ in the philosophy of life. He aspired to be divine -- and he was. It is natural that before he reached his goal he had to walk the highway of mistakes. But we find him, nevertheless, in every tendency true to one main motive, and that was to benefit mankind. He was one who wanted to be great through his smallness. If he had failed to become President he would be, no doubt, just as great as he is now, but only God would appreciate it. The judgment of the world is usually wrong in the beginning, and it takes centuries to correct it. But in the case of Lincoln the world was right from the start."
How Much Does it Cost to Light Christmas Lights? • 8 hours ago • 1
Rob Cockerham went around to everyone he kows who decorates with Christmas lights, using his Kill-a-watt meter to calculate how much they spend to light them up. The result is a three-page explanation that boils down to this: the energy used by Christmas lights doesn't cost much. The house shown is extravagantly but tastefully decorated with icicle lights.
This is probably the most lights you can have on your house without having strangers stop to take photos. They are all incandescent mini-lights and use a total of 724 watts. That's about 1 horsepower in energy use, which costs about 9¢ per hour.
Of course, the price of energy by kilowatt varies by location, but you may be able to find an example that compares to your lights. Link
This is What Getting Your Vagina Vajazzled Looks Like
The First Text Message, Sent Twenty Years Ago, Was 'Merry Christmas'
Text messaging turns twenty - celebrating two decades of helping people plan where to meet, wish happy birthday, break up, make up, and generally communicate without actually having to talk to one another
Merry Christmas
thanks, Dana
Prior to 1850, sugar was a hot commodity that only society's most wealthy could affor
Cock in the air
Besieged in Stalingrad during the bitter winter of 1943, the German 6th Army sent home one last post before surrendering in February to the encircling Red Army. An excerpt from one anonymous letter:
It's strange that one does not start to value things until one is about to lose them. There is a bridge from my heart to yours, spanning all the vastness of distance. Across that bridge I have been used to writing to you about our daily round and the world we live in out here. I wanted to tell you the truth when I came home, and then we would never have spoken of war again. Now you will learn the truth, the last truth, earlier than I intended. And now I can write no more.
There will always be bridges as long as there are shores; all we need is the courage to tread them. One of them now leads to you, the other into eternity -- which for me is ultimately the same thing.
Tomorrow morning I shall set foot on the last bridge. That's a literary way of describing death, but you know I always liked to write things differently because of the pleasure words and their sounds gave me. Lend me your hand, so that the way is not too hard.
It was never delivered. Hitler ordered the letters analyzed to learn the state of army morale. The Wehrmacht reported that 2.1 percent of the letters approved of the conduct of the war, 3.4 percent were vengefully opposed, 57.1 percent were skeptical and negative, 33 percent were indifferent, and 4.4 percent were doubtful.
Life on Life on Life
James Tyrwhitt-Drake runs the mind-blowing blog Infinity Imagined, where you'll find visualizations of things great and small, patterns in nature and math, and the beauty of discovery. Tyrwhitt-Drake created a gif image with a scanning electron microscope of a zoom into a tiny crustacean that had a diatom on it. More zoom reveals a single bacterium on the diatom. Cosmic. Link -via Smithsonian/the Presurfer
By 1935, the game of Monopoly--including the name--had formed. Two years later, Parker Brothers included die-cast metal player pieces, including a car, a top hat, an iron, a shoe and a thimble, in Monopoly sets. Why? Eddie Deezen asked John Chaneski, an expert on board games:
When Monopoly was first created in the early 1930s, there were no pieces like we know them, so they went to Cracker Jack, which at the time was offering tiny metal tchotchkes, like cars. They used the same molds to make the Monopoly pieces. Game Show sells some antique Cracker Jack prizes and, sure enough, the toy car is exactly the same as the Monopoly car. In fact, there’s also a candlestick, which seems to be the model for the one in Clue. [...]
I think they chose Cracker Jack prizes that symbolize wealth and poverty. The car, top hat, and dog (especially a little terrier like Asta, then famous from “The Thin Man” movie series) were all possessions of the wealthy. The thimble, wheelbarrow, old shoe, and iron were possessions or tools of the poor.
Link -via VA Viper | Photo: therichbrooks
Think Fast
What culture pioneered the use of deodorant?
Ancient Egyptians
(Think Fast Answer: Ancient Egyptians) Ancient Egyptians were the first to popularize the use of deodorant. They combined citrus oils and used cinnamon and other spices that would mask body odor and wouldn't go bad in the heat.
For those of you who don't know- that's Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard. No, the audio isn't dubbed, she is actually talking about a doomsday apocalypse. She warns about the Mayans being right, zombies, and K-Pop. Pretty scary stuff Gillard.
Why is she doing this? She believes in the "End of the World" of course! Quick note, the "End of the World" is the name of a radio show which is set to air today in Australia. The hosts of the show, Tom and Alex, somehow coaxed Gillard into promoting the show.
Oh man, you got my hopes up... ..I can't be the only one who guiltily wants a zombie apocalypse, right? I mean sure there is the risk of being eaten alive, but I think beating zombie brains in looks like fun!
Paper toys bring out the kid in all of us. They're something you can play with, yet are delicate and creative. Brave Face Paper has come out with a few paper kits to help with your own creations. There is a crab, a squid, and a dragon kit- the squid being my favorite. It's just so cute, in a weird squid-y way.
The highest happiness of man is to have probed what is knowable and quietly to revere what is unknowable.
The moral of the story is: Don't call names. Especially when the guy has a pet rock. Comic by Gregor Czaykowski of Loading Artist. Link -via Bits and Pieces

Read not to contradict and confute, not to believe and take for granted, not to find talk and discourse, but to weigh and consider. --Sir Francis Bacon
The Burger That's So Hot You Have to Sign a Waiver Before Eating It
No, Atomic Burger insists, they're not kidding. If you want to eat the Fallout Challenge -- a burger rated at millions of Scoville units, you'll have to sign a waiver of liability. You also have to wear gloves because otherwise you'll burn your hands with that thing that you're about to put inside your body.
But enduing that experience, assuming that you actually survive, is worth the pain. That's because you get a free t-shirt and your name on the restaurant's Wall of Flame:
Just one in ten of the 500 people who've taken the challenge have completed it so far, with Mr Bunce admitting he could only manage a quarter of the burger.
He added: 'We did a four-week special of the Fallout Challenge, but after the special came to an end we had so many people asking to do it, it ended up becoming a permanent fixture on our menu.
'The sauce in the burger contains a variety of chillies including the Ghost Chilli and the Scotch Bonnet. But what gives the sauce a real kick is the Ghost Chilli extract which registers at 4.2 million Scoville units.
A new study finds that prehistoric humans correctly depicted the gait of four-legged animals much more frequently than modern artists

We all have hundreds of DNA flaws waiting to do us in! Or not.

Everyone has on average 400 flaws in their DNA, a UK study suggests…Most are “silent” mutations and do not affect health, although they can cause problems when passed to future generations…Others are linked to conditions such as cancer or heart disease, which appear in later life, say geneticists.
The evidence comes from the 1,000 Genomes project, which is mapping normal human genetic differences, from tiny changes in DNA to major mutations.
In the study, 1,000 seemingly healthy people from Europe, the Americas and East Asia had their entire genetic sequences decoded, to look at what makes people different from each other, and to help in the search for genetic links to diseases.
Thanks Ed
"Color is hard. How do you sighted people keep them all straight?" Tommy Wilson has been blind since birth. He produces handy videos that explain that experience to sighted people, such as how he cooks food and what it's like for him to dream.
How do we sighted people explain the concept of color to him? Apparently not that well, as Wilson explains in this humorous video.
Something for the person who has everything…
Shit glitter
J.B.S. Haldane was once asked what his study of biology had taught him about God.
He said that the Creator, if he exists, has "an inordinate fondness for beetles."
From a 1921 essay by A.A. Milne:
TERALBAY is not a word which one uses much in ordinary life. Rearrange the letters, however, and it becomes such a word. A friend -- no, I can call him a friend no longer -- a person gave me this collection of letters as I was going to bed and challenged me to make a proper word of it. He added that Lord Melbourne -- this, he alleged, is a well-known historical fact -- Lord Melbourne had given this word to Queen Victoria once, and it had kept her awake the whole night. After this, one could not be so disloyal as to solve it at once. For two hours or so, therefore, I merely toyed with it. Whenever I seemed to be getting warm I hurriedly thought of something else. This quixotic loyalty has been the undoing of me; my chances of a solution have slipped by, and I am beginning to fear that they will never return. While this is the case, the only word I can write about is TERALBAY.
The answer is not RATEABLY, or BAT-EARLY, which "ought to mean something, but it doesn't." Rudolf Flesch notes that TRAYABLE is not a word, and that, though TEARABLY appears in small type in Webster's Unabridged, "it obviously won't do."
What's the answer? There's no trick -- it's an ordinary English word.

I know in my heart that as long as trashing the planet and trashing each other, a healthy, holistic and healed world is not possible. We cannot have peace ON the earth unless we also have peace WITH the earth.
--Julia Butterfly Hill, Environmentalist
From Henry Sampson's History of Advertising From the Earliest Times (1875):
In 1821 Lord Camden decided to postpone the start of the fall hunting season. He directed a servant to notify the people, and the servant posted this handbill all over Kent:
Notice is hereby given that the Marquis of Camden (on account of the backwardness of the harvest) will not shoot himself, nor any of his tenants, till the 14th of September.
The Earl of Jersey had similar troubles -- his servants once posted this notice at Osterly Park:
Ten shillings reward. Any person found trespassing on these lands or damaging these fences on conviction will receive the above reward.
"Somebody once said that nobody expects to find education or ability in a lord," wrote Sampson, "but that is because his household are expected to fulfill his duties properly."
It’ll look like hundreds of postage stamps fluttering toward Earth — each an independent satellite transmitting a signal unique to the person who helped send it to space.
A Cornell-based project called KickSat is set to launch more than 200 of these tiny satellites, nicknamed “sprites,” into low-Earth orbit as part of a routine NASA-administered mission in 2013 to the International Space Station. And unlike traditional, big government space exploration, KickSat is truly a launch by the people.
Several years ago…Zac Manchester…now a graduate student in aerospace engineering, dreamt up the idea of crowd-sourced, personal space exploration. He and Ryan Zhou…and Justin Atchison…designed and built a prototype spacecraft that fits in the palm of the hand and costs just a few hundred dollars to make. The sprites are a type of micro-satellite called a “ChipSat…”
Manchester’s goal, he says in his blog about the mission, “is to bring down the huge cost of spaceflight, allowing anyone from a curious high school student or basement tinkerer to a professional scientist to explore what has until now been the exclusive realm of governments and large companies. By shrinking the spacecraft, we can fit more into a single launch slot and split the costs many ways. I want to make it easy enough and affordable enough for anyone to explore space.”
Sprites are the size of a cracker but are outfitted with solar cells, a radio transceiver and a microcontroller (tiny computer). KickSat, which is the name of the sprites’ launching unit, is a CubeSat, a standardized cubic satellite the size of a loaf of bread, frequently used in space research.
Using to find sponsors for the mission, Manchester raised nearly $75,000 as more than 300 people sponsored a sprite that will transmit an identifying signal, such as the initials of the donor. In 2013, about 250 sprites will be sent into space. One person, who donated $10,000, Manchester added, will get to “push the big red button” on the day of the launch.
A delightful dedication to citizen science. A special tradition centuries-old.
Too cool Ed ~ we should have sponsored one
Writing in a prison diary in 1943, Ho Chi Minh discovered a lesson in Chinese ideographs:
Take away the sign (man) from the sign for prison,
Add to it (probability), that makes the word (nation).
Take the head-particle from the sign for misfortune:
That gives the word (fidelity).
Add the sign for man (standing) to the sign for worry,
That gives the word (quality).
Take away the bamboo top from the sign for prison,
That gives you dragon.
People who come out of prison can build up the country,
Misfortune is a test of people's fidelity.
Those who protest at injustice are people of true merit.
When the prison doors are opened, the real dragon will fly out.
On his release, he started the August Revolution.
Edis Productions edited together footage of places all over the world to make this inspiring and soothing video, sure to make you fall in love with Mother Earth. And then you'll want to go visit these lovely places. -via Uproxx
Turritopsis nutricula is an immortal jellyfish. That isn’t hyperbole – it really is immortal.

After reaching sexual maturity, this jellyfish is able to reverse its aging process and become a polyp again. The ability to reverse the life cycle is probably unique in the animal kingdom, and allows the jellyfish to bypass death, rendering the Turritopsis nutricula biologically immortal. Lab tests showed that 100% of specimens reverted to the polyp stage.

More info:
Thanks Dana
adj. attracting the opposite sex
n. the state of development in which one becomes attracted to members of the opposite sex
A fanatic is someone who cannot change his mind and will not change the subject.
--Sir Winston Churchill

The darkness drops again but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?
--William Butler Yeats, The Second Coming

When we fear things I think that we wish for them... every fear hides a wish. ~ David Mamet, Author

Best place to be born in 2013 — Switzerland

Switzerland is the best country for a baby to be born in 2013, according to a new study by the Economist Intelligence Unit, which is based on both subjective and objective quality of life factors.
The variables include life expectancy, gender equality, political freedoms, and even climate, but because the study looks at where “to be born” not “where to live,” some of the factors look at what life will be like in those countries in 2030, when children born in 2013 reach adulthood.
Rounding out the top 10 are:
2. Australia
3. Norway
4. Sweden
5. Denmark
6. Singapore
7. New Zealand
8. Netherlands
9. Canada
10. Hong Kong
The report authors write:
Being rich helps more than anything else, but it is not all that counts; things like crime, trust in public institutions and the health of family life matter too. In all, the index takes 11 statistically significant indicators into account.
The United States didn’t crack the top 10 this year, because American “babies will inherit the large debts of the boomer generation,” the researchers write. Could have included mediocre education, crumbling infrastructure in that same sentence.
In the 1988 survey, the United States came in first, followed closely by mostly European countries and several high-performing Asian ones, such as South Korea and Japan…
Thanks, ED
"Do you know who's engaged? Hugh Hefner. He said today about his fiancee, 'I've fallen for her and I can't get up.'" -David Letterman
"Facebook has announced that it will not be developing any of its own games and will continue to rely on outside companies. Facebook can still take credit for that one popular game: 'Guess who got fat since high school.' --Jimmy Fallon
What a pampered parrot! His owner built a vehicle he can control with a joystick, and motor around by himself. If you're impressed with that, wait until you see the computerized autonomous docking ability. See, parrots have a tendency to leave their Birdbuggies just anywhere, so this contraption takes itself home! -via Viral Viral Videos

Portland On The Web: Washington Post, Travel & Leisure, Portland Pulp & More

Nothing causes a panic in Portland quite like baby animal drama (except maybe a bacon shortage). The Oregon Zoo found itself in a real 'Dumbo' situation this week as news outlets reported its newest baby elephant could be taken from its mother and sold to a company that rents elephants to the circus (gasp!). The Oregon Zoo says the baby is definitely staying here. No word yet on whether the yet-to-be-named baby elephant will develop the ability to fly.

In other news, the city has spent $700,000 on a new piece of public art near the Hawthorne Bridge that has already been compared to a set-piece from 'Waterworld' by passers-by. Despite our post-apocalyptic decorating tendencies, Portland was ranked #1 among American cities for environmental friendliness, microbrews, public transportation, street food & pet friendly vacations. Oh, and the Unipiper is really excited for 'The Hobbit' to come out.

Here is a round-up of the goings-on in Portland this week:

Washington Post: Oregon Zoo says baby elephant will stay put
OregonLive: Solving the mystery of the Hawthorne Bridge 'Thingy'
Travel + Leisure: America's Favorite Cities 2012
Portland Pulp: Portland's unicycling bagpiper celebrates 'The Hobbit' the only way he know how
OregonLive: Two Grammy nominations for the Oregon Symphony
Examiner: Aviation Gin named top 50 spirit of 2012
Wired: How an obscure comic artist became John McAfee's lifeline to the world

When I bought my new Lexus my two sons asked me who would inherit it if I met my demise. I pondered the question, then told them if I passed away on an even day, the son born on an even day would get it. If it happened on an odd day, the one born on the odd day would get it.

A few weekends later, while river rafting with one of my sons, I was tossed out of the boat. As I floated in the rapids, I heard my son yelling, "It's the wrong day!"

After browsing the restaurant menu, I had a question for the waitress. "About the salmon entree, is that a steak or a fillet?"

"Neither," she said. "It's a fish."


"Do you know who's engaged? Hugh Hefner. His fiancee is really, really looking forward to the ceremony, and people are asking, 'Are you talking about the wedding or the funeral?'" -David Letterman

Hit the gym this morning, then had a nice shower.

I've just picked up a bottle of home brew from one of the neighbours for this afternoon.

I've got a few joints rolled up for the XBox tournament with the guys.

After that I'll fuck around online with some porn and gambling sites.

Then to finish off the perfect day, it's a nice blow job before I go to bed.

Fuck, I love prison!
Not So Frosty…
Frosty bj

"Kate Middleton is having a baby. Snooki says she wants to give baby advice to Kate Middleton. Snooki said her number one tip is to find out who the father is." -Conan O'Brien


"In Russia, there was a 125-mile traffic jam that had drivers stuck in traffic for three days. Here in Los Angeles that's known as Friday." -Conan O'Brien
Minute Physics quickly lets us in on some slight but important differences in what we thought we knew and what really is. Since I never studied physics, a lot of this was new to me. -via Daily of the Day
Either graphics are getting better, or Canadians are getting drunker.
Either way, a bizarre problem has cropped up at Mosaic Stadium in Regina, Saskatchewan.

For weeks, the cheery image of the burning log was displayed on the video scoreboard at the Saskatchewan Roughriders home venue. The flaming log was also shown on banner screens across the stands.

The problem was, from a distance some people thought the stadium was on fire - there have been four frantic calls to 911 in the past few weeks.

Deputy fire chief Gerard Kay said callers were very descriptive, reporting "a very bright flame. In some cases even the smell of smoke."

Standing in the parking lot at the nearby Regina field house recently, a CBC journalist saw the televised flames apparently looming over neighborhood houses.

A fire crew was dispatched to the scene just last week. "It's funny, someone jokingly said, 'Y'know, I don't know about that Yule log. Someone is going to think the stadium is on fire,'" Roughriders CEO Jim Hopson said. "Sure as heck, someone thought the stadium was on fire."

Another holiday-themed display will likely go up later, he said.

Did you know you have stripes?
Before you go looking, they're invisible - if they were visible, we wouldn't need to tell you about them! The stripes (or Blaschko's lines, after the discoverer Alfred Blaschko) typically follow the same basic pattern - V-shapes on the back, S-shapes on the abdomen and an inverted U-shape around the breast and upper arm. They seem to be a clue to embryological deve
lopment, though they do not correspond to structures such as nervous, endocrine, lymphatic or vascular.

Though we still don't know where they come from, the current idea is that each tissue patch is made of cells all originating from a single cell during development. The clone cells then follow a set pattern, resulting in Blaschko's lines. The biologist PZ Myers uses the analogy of a clay figurine to describe this idea: "Imagine taking a piece of yellow clay and sandwiching it between two pieces of green clay into a block, and then pushing and stretching the clay block to make a human figurine. The yellow would make a band somewhere in the middle, all right, but it wouldn’t be a simple rectilinear slice anymore — it would express a more complex border that reflected the overall flow of the medium."

Though these stripes are invisible for the majority of people, some conditions cause them to become very visible. The best examples generally come from people who are mosaics/chimeras (mosaics have two or more genetically-distinct cell populations but come from a singly zygote, Chimeras also have geneticially distinct cell groups but come from two zygotes). The stripes betray the different genotypes. Additionally, if one of the genotypes is predisposed toward dermatological conditions, these conditions can develop according to the lines.

They can also become visible in women as a result of X-inactivation, where an X chromosome is shut down in each cell (you may have two, but you only need one to function). Some cells will have the father's X chromosome active, other cells have the mother's. Technically, this means all women are mosaics, because different X chromosomes are silenced in different cells. Visible Blaschko's lines can result from an X-linked skin condition.

So what do they mean? Well, we like Myers' take. "The cool thing about [Blaschko's lines] is that there is a hidden map of your secret history as an individual embedded in silent patterns in your skin - you were not defined as a single, simple, discrete genetic entity at fertilization, but are the product of complicated, subtle changes and errors and shufflings and sortings of cells. We’re all beautiful pointillist masterpieces."

Photo found on Pharyngula.

Funeral mixed with football game viewing

HUGO, Minn. - A Minnesota woman said the funeral for her late boyfriend will involve pizza and watching the Minnesota Vikings take on the Green Bay Packers. Terri Moffitt of Hugo said Don Brommerich, who died of brain cancer Nov. 11 at the age of 53, was "a no-fuss kind of guy" as well as a diehard Vikings fan, the St. Paul Pioneer Press reported Thursday. "I didn't want a priest or minister that Don didn't know up there blabbing for an hour about a guy he never knew," Moffitt said. "We were looking at the football stuff and I said, 'Oh, there's a Packer-Viking game on Sunday. That's it.'" Tim Tarmann of Roberts Family Funeral Home in Forest Lake helped Moffitt plan the celebration of Brommerich's life. "We are seeing a shift in funeral services where more and more families are wanting a unique celebration to honor their loved ones," Tarmann said. "The Viking-Packer rivalry was significant to Don, so what a perfect way for family and friends to honor his life. Just the way Don would have wanted it."
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex !
A friend of mine was wearing one
when he was shot by the woman's husband.
Pass this public safety information on....
Thanks, Cindy
"Hard to take seriously predictions about the end of the world from the Maya, a culture that could not predict its own demise"
Neil deGrasse Tyson
How Many Licks Does It Take.

Someone saw a blonde eating a Tootsie Roll Pop and asked her, "So, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?"

Without a thought, the blonde replied, "Beats me, but it took almost the whole day just to lick through the wrapper."

In response to my recent end-of-days posts, this from a concerned fan. You may now delete cookies.
The Best Part of Old Age

A reporter was interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?"

She simply replied, "No peer pressure."

Q and A Quickies

Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance?
A: Put a little boogey in it.

Q: What did Delaware?
A: She wore a brand New Jersey!

QUOTE: "The first question I ask myself when something doesn't seem to be beautiful is why do I think it's not beautiful. And very shortly you discover that there is no reason."

HINT: (1912-1992), American composer, music theorist, writer, and artist.

ANSWER: John Cage.


The reindeer family includes caribou as well as a few smaller subspecies. In fact, reindeer and Caribou are essentially the same animal, although reindeer are domesticated and caribou are wild.

Reindeer are found in the arctic and subarctic regions of North America, Europe and Asia. Reindeer have thick, multi-layered fur that is specially suited for the harsh arctic climate where they live.

Reindeer have an excellent sense of smell. Because food is scarce in the Arctic, reindeer use their great sense of smell to detect food buried deep beneath the snow.

Male reindeer are called bulls and females are called cows. Baby reindeer are called calves. Reindeer typically have a lifespan of around 10 years.

Reindeer are the only deer species in which both the male and females grow antlers, although the males' antlers are bigger.

Reindeer shed and regrow their antlers every year. Males usually shed their antlers by early December, while females usually don't shed their antlers until after they give birth, in the spring.

Subaru SHARC wins 2012 LA Design Challenge

Screen Shot 2012-12-05 at 1.57.47 PM
Subaru’s SHARC (Subaru Highway Automated Response Concept) has been named the winner of the 2012 LA Design Challenge. The futuristic concept car was chosen by the judges as the best embodiment of the “Highway Patrol Vehicle 2025.”
Subaru’s SHARC beat six other automotive design studios, each of which presented its own concept of “the ultimate 2025 law enforcement patrol vehicle that supports the needs of dynamic urban environments.”
Subaru’s design for an unmanned 24-hour highway monitoring vehicle is intended for use by Hawaii’s highway patrol to police the state’s hypothetical “Paradise Highway” spanning the waters between the islands in 2025. The design is meant to be not only cutting edge, but also to conform to Hawaii’s UltraGreen carbon-neutral environmental regulations and eliminate the need for a large patrol staff in a time of shrinking budgets.
The SHARC is basically a big kevlar balloon with a framework made out of memory material that changes when you run a charge through it. Launched out of a tube, it expands to full size revealing wheels that are shockingly multipurpose. Each one has a 96 bhp electric wheel hub motor and the band-like tires have two tread surfaces set at an angle so the SHARC can make high-speed runs or navigate rough terrain. In between the treads is a slot for the headlamps and tail lights to shine through and the blade-like wheel spokes are actually propellers for when the SHARC takes to the air.
At the end of the day, SHARC deflates itself, rolls itself up again and goes back in its tube.
Thanks Ed ~ I want, so I can race someone!
Letter from the Bishop of Chelmsford to the Times, Feb. 3, 1923:
Sir, I wonder how many of us, born and brought up in the Victorian era, would like to think that in the year, say, 5923, the tomb of Queen Victoria would be invaded by a party of foreigners who rifled it of its contents, took the body of the great Queen from the mausoleum in which it had been placed amid the grief of the whole people, and exhibited it to all and sundry who might wish to see it?
The question arises whether such treatment as we should count unseemly in the case of the great English Queen is not equally unseemly in the case of King Tutankhamen. I am not unmindful of the great historical value which may accrue from the examination of the collection of jewelry, furniture, and, above all, of papyri discovered within the tomb, and I realize that wide interests may justify their thorough investigation and even, in special cases, their temporary removal. But, in any case, I protest strongly against the removal of the body of the King from the place where it has rested for thousands of years. Such a removal borders on indecency, and traverses all Christian sentiment concerning the sacredness of the burial places of the dead.
J.E. Chelmsford

Weekly Mind-Scrambler

I'm often seen around a lot, referred to many ways, See me black and you may find misfortune haunts your days. Tell a thing, that should have been kept quiet, to all around, Then look inside the sack, there I'm no longer to be found. Nosiness, prying, snooping, leaves me fearing, full of dread, For all these things are likely to see me soon lying dead. These clues combined should start to give a picture, an idea, Of who or what I am, so can you tell me? Is it clear?

"Pseudoscience describes theories that sound like science but are actually just made up, like aromatherapy or biorhythms or love." -Craig Ferguson

"According to a Twitter study, people are happiest on the weekends and when their workday is over. They also discovered that if you stand in front of a moving train, it will kill you." -Jay Leno

"The NYPD is apparently teaching its officers how to be more polite. It's true last time I got frisked, the cop was like, 'Have you lost weight?'" -Jimmy Fallon

A minor league ballplayer, left in charge of a baby cousin, suddenly realized that he did not have the least idea how to change a diaper. Frantically, he called a friend who was luckily a father.

The friend calmed down the ballplayer, then gave him the following instructions. "Place the diaper in the position of a baseball diamond, with you at bat. Fold second base over home plate. Place baby on pitcher's mound, then pin first base and third base at home plate!"

Making a gingerbread house is a fun and traditional craft for the holidays, but there’s no reason why crafting with gingerbread should be limited to architecture. New generation gingerbread construction only limited by what can be imagined. Here are some geeky gingerbread creations inspired by popular science fiction worlds.

Redshirt Gingerbread Men
Instructables member SeaSkyShore made gingerbread men in the images of the characters from Star Trek. You can, of course, recognize Bones, Kirk, Spock, and that poor nameless sap that gets destroyed as soon as the away team transports to an alien planet. And since you want to “destroy” these gingerbread men by eating them, you’ll want to put red shirts on most of them! Complete directions for the cookies are at Instructables.
Follow this Instructable to make your own little army of expendables.
Here's a nice one for you.
I haven't seen this much pink since my home study gynecology course.
Thanks Phlax (who else? lol)
Object Lesson
In 1969, Sufi scholar Idries Shah published a volume called The Book of the Book. Its opening pages told of a king whose people would not listen to his teachings, as he lacked an instrument with which to teach them.
The king meets a stranger who tells him of a revered wise man who attributed his knowledge to a tome kept in a place of honor in his room. When the wise man died, his followers eagerly opened the book and found writing on only one page. "When you realise the difference between the container and the content," it said, "you will have knowledge."
The rest of Shah's 200-page book was blank.
Welcome to ALMA!
ALMA (the Atacama Large Millimeter/submillimeter Array) is one of the largest ground-based astronomy projects of the next decade and will be the major new facility for observations in the millimeter/submillimeter regime. It will enable transformational research into the physics of the cold Universe, probe the first stars and galaxies, and directly image the formation of planets. When completed, ALMA will be comprised of a giant array of fifty 12-m antennas, which can be configured to achieve baselines up to 16 km. It will be equipped with state-of-the-art receivers that cover all the atmospheric windows up to 1 THz. An additional, compact array of 7-m and 12-m antennas will greatly enhance ALMA's ability to image extended sources.
ALMA construction is scheduled to be completed in 2013. Prior to this, scientists can exploit the continuously evolving capabilities of ALMA during a period known as Early Science. Expected to start in the second half of 2011, Early Science observations will be obtained with a very limited number of antennas, array configurations, receivers and correlator setups. More details and up-to-date information can be found in the ALMA Science Portal and the News section.
Pictures: Inside the World's Most Powerful Laser
Blood Red Ocean: Not Exactly The End of Days
A massive algae bloom along Australia’s beaches turn the ocean the color of blood.
It looks like something straight out of Dr. Seuss's world, but this is no imaginary scene. A form of algae has been spreading across Australia's eastern coast since Tuesday, turning the water an alarming shade of red and forcing at least ten beaches, including Sydney's popular Bondi Beach, to close.
Neil deGrasse Tyson Helps His New 'Bud' Superman Get A Glimpse Of Home
Dr. Demento has been on the radio for over 35 years. This is tribute to his earlier days.
Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine.

It's a beautiful day and love is in the air.

Marie leans over to Pierre and says, 'Pierre, kiss me!'

Pierre grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie's lips.

'What are you doing, Pierre?' says the startled Marie.

'I am Pierre, French fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I have red wine!' She smiles and they start kissing.

Things began to heat up a little and Marie says, 'Pierre, kiss me lower.'

Our hero tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and pours it on her breasts. ' Pierre ! Pierre ! What are you doing now?' asks the bewildered Marie.

'I am Pierre, French fighter pilot! When I have white meat, I have white wine!' She giggles and they resume their passionate interlude.

Marie then leans close to his ear and whispers, 'Pierre, kiss me, kiss me much lower!'

Pierre rips off her underwear, grabs a bottle of Cognac and pours it on her pubes...

He then strikes a match and sets the cognac on fire. Marie shrieks and dives into the River Seine.

Standing waist deep, Marie throws her arms into the air and screams furiously, 'PIERRE, WHAT IN HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?'

Our 'hero' stands and shouts defiantly, 'I am Pierre, French fighter pilot! If I go down, I go down in flames!'
UrsaSantaBaby ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1 comment:

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