Sunday, October 28, 2012

Paws & Claws ~ October 7, 2012 ~ Happy Birthday NASA & Neil deGrasse Tyson ~

The major difference between a thing that might go wrong
and a thing which cannot possibly go wrong is
that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong
it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair

~ Douglas Adams
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See Explanation.  Clicking on the picture will download  the highest resolution version available.
An Ancient Stream Bank on Mars
Image Credit:
NASA, JPL-Caltech, MSSS
Explanation: Fresh evidence of an ancient stream has been found on Mars. The robotic rover Curiosity has run across unusual surface features that carry a strong resemblance to stream banks on Earth. Visible in the above image, for example, is a small overhanging rock ledge that was quite possibly created by water erosion beneath. The texture of the ledge appears to be a sedimentary conglomerate, the dried remains of many smaller rocks stuck together. Beneath the ledge are numerous small pebbles, possibly made smooth by tumbling in and around the once-flowing stream. Pebbles in the streambed likely fell there as the bank eroded. Circled at the upper right is a larger rock possibly also made smooth by stream erosion. Curiosity has now discovered several indications of dried streambeds on Mars on its way to its present location where it will be exploring the unusual conjunction of three different types of landscape.
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2012 October
See Explanation.  Clicking on the picture will download  the highest resolution version available.
Aurora and Fireball Over Norway
Image Credit & Copyright: Ole C. Salomonsen (Arctic Light Photo)
Explanation: What's happening behind that mountain? A convergence of variable sky spectacles. One night in mid-September near Tromsø, Norway, high red aurora could be seen shimmering through lower green aurora in a way that created a striking and somewhat unusual violet glow. Suddenly, though, the sky flashed with the brightest fireball the astrophotographer had ever seen, as a small pebble from outer space violently crashed into the Earth's atmosphere. The glow illuminated the distant mountain peak known as Otertinden of the Lyngen Alps. The bright meteor, which coincidently disappeared behind the same mountain, was also reflected in the foreground Signalelva River. Although you might consider yourself lucky to see either an aurora or a bright meteor, pictures of them together have been recorded several times previously.
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2012 October
See Explanation. Moving the cursor over the image will bring up an annotated version. Clicking on the image will bring up the highest resolution version available.
Goat Aurora Over Greenland
Image Credit & Copyright: Juan Carlos Casado (TWAN)
Explanation: Sometimes it's hard to believe what you see in the sky. During the SheliosExpedition to Greenland in late August, even veteran sky enthusiasts saw auroras so colorful, so fast changing, and so unusual in form that they could remember nothing like it. As the ever changing auroras evolved, huge shapes spread across the sky morphed from one familiar form into another, including what looked to be the head of a goat (shown above), the head of an elephant, a strange green-tailed comet, and fingers on a celestial hand. Even without the aurora, the sky would be notable for the arching band of our Milky Way Galaxy and the interesting field of stars, nebulas, and galaxies. In contrast, in the foreground is a farm house in Tasiusaq, Kujalleq. Greenland. The Shelios project exists not only to observe auroras but to motivate students to consider a career in science.
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Australian Nancy Wake fought fearlessly for the Allies in World War II, first for the French resistance and later as a spy for Britain’s Special Operations Executive.
Parachuted into the Auvergne in April 1944, she was hanging from a tree when a resistance fighter told her, “I hope that all the trees in France bear such beautiful fruit this year.”
She said, “Don’t give me that French shit.”
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I was working in a scrap yard during summer vacation at engineering university. I used to work repairing construction equipment.
One afternoon, I was taking apart a piling hammer that had some very large bolts holding it together. One of the nuts had corroded on to the bolt; to free it I started heating the nut with an oxy-acetylene torch. As I was doing this, one of the dimmest apprentices I have ever known came along. He asked me what I was doing. I patiently explained that if I heated the nut it would grow larger and release its grip on the bolt so I could then remove it.
"So things get larger when they get hot, do they?" he asked.
Suddenly, an idea flashed into my mind. "Yes," I said, "that's why days are longer in summer and shorter in winter."
There was a long pause, then his face cleared. "You know, I always wondered about that," he said.
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I don’t understand the point of strip clubs. If I wanted a woman to take all my money and sexually frustrate me, I’d stay at home with my wife.
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Healthy Living from Health.comhttp://health.chtah.net/a/tBQbHUwBFYNexB8uYfUCFNC1E2t/top2

YOUR GUIDE TO HALLOWEEN CANDY
http://health.chtah.net/a/tBQbHUwBFYNexB8uYfUCFNC1E2t/top23
Costume parties are right aroud the corner, but so are calorie-laden candy dishes. Our advice? Limit portions (don't scarf down the office leftovers!), and keep calories in mind. Here's the lowdown on some of our faves.
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Leopard Attacks Impala, Observers Catch The Entire Thing On Camera (VIDEO)
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Petitioning Troop 212, San Francisco Bay Area

Boy Scouts: Don't let your anti-gay policy deny my son his Eagle award

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Paul Broun: Evolution, Big Bang 'Lies Straight From The Pit Of Hell'
Broun is a high-ranking member of the House Science Committee, of which Rep. Todd Akin (R-Mo.) is also a member.
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Reptiles, known as egg-layers, form their eggs and it completes its embryological development outside the body of mother. However, some species are not following this pattern. A lizard species, yellow-bellied three-toed skink, forms the egg and keeps it inside of the body until baby lizard almost completes its embryological development. The level of this development inside the body changes dependi
ng on altitute and temperature. As altitude gets higher and temperature gets lower, these lizards almost gives birth to live babies.

This change in birth style creates some problems and solution to these problems. The main problem is about nourishment of the embryo. The egg shell gets thinner to make breathing of embryo possible, then, the amount of calcium stored in the egg shell lowers. Since thin shell stores less calcium, baby lizards may have some health problems. James Stewart, a biologist, explains how lizards are evolving to solve this problem :"Now we can see that the uterus secretes calcium that becomes incorporated into the embryo—it's basically the early stages of the evolution of a placenta in reptiles"
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Bizarre News - Sweet and Sour Bambi. No substitutions!
We have all heard the jokes about Chinese restaurants serving cat meat instead of chicken or pork. Well, wouldn't you know it, the joke's on us. That isn't cat. It's probably venison.

Customers at the Red Flower Chinese Restaurant in Williamsburg, Ky., alerted authorities after they spotted something they probably wish they hadn't: restaurant employees wheeling road kill back to the kitchen.

The road kill was apparently a deer stuffed into a trash can. "There was actually a blood trail they were mopping up behind the garbage can," customer Katie Hopkins said. "There was a tail, and like a foot and a leg sticking out of the garbage can, and they wheeled it straight back into the kitchen." Local health inspector Paul Lawson was called in to investigate. Lawson said the restaurant owners told him they didn't know they were doing anything wrong. "They said they didn't know they weren't allowed to do that. So that makes me concerned that maybe they could have before. They didn't admit to doing it before." The owner said he didn't plan to serve the deer to customers-instead he planned to use it to feed his family.

The restaurant has been temporarily shut down but will be eligible to reopen as soon as it passes another health inspection and proves it has been washed and sanitized.
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Andy Ellison's freaky cool animated .gifs are essentially compiled cross sections of vegetables. He works at Boston University and has access to an MRI machine, which equips him do cool stuff like this.
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Punctuation adds a lot of clarity and meaning to our writing. Can we add more? There are quite a few lesser-known punctuation marks we should be using to dress up our essays, correspondence, blog posts, and texts with. See those marks? Find out what they all mean at mental_floss. Link
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What do you do when a sovereign nation refuses to pay its debt to you? Most people wouldn't, couldn't do anything ... but not billionaire Paul Singer.
He decided to play pirate:
A billionaire buccaneer from Wall Street declared war on Argentina yesterday, seizing the flagship of its navy in a decades-long battle over the country’s bonds, which sank in a 2001 financial collapse. [...]
Sources said Singer has been following the course of the tall ship as it sailed around the world, carrying more than 200 people, including about 70 cadets in training.
He thought the courts in Ghana would be the most sympathetic, and they were. A judge there ordered the ship held until Argentina posts a bond for an undisclosed amount of money. [...]
The change of command in Africa was not a happy ceremony. “It’s impossible to imagine then that one of the most important symbols of the Argentine navy would be detained at the port of Tema, Ghana, over a judicial order,” fumed Capt. Carlos Alievi.
Kaja Whitehouse of the NY Post has the story: Link
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Jason Torchinsky realized that although it would be difficult to steal the space shuttle Endeavour from Los Angeles, it was not, technically speaking impossible. The heist will just require some creative thinking, a bit of luck and some money. Read his step-by-step plan at the link Link -via VA Viper
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Is this the coolest-looking dog ever or what? Baffy is a bomb-sniffing dog, posted to reddit by his fellow soldier guynamedgriffin. He tells us Baffy came to him already named, so he doesn't know the reason behind it, and that Baffy has already identified about 45 bombs. He also says:
Yes the terrain can be rugged at times, so the boots protect his paws, they also help when he is kicking ass.
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The 30,000-year-old body of a wooly mammoth recently uncovered by Jenya, an 11-year-old Russian boy, is the most well-preserved remains of the species discovered in at least 100 years.
The mammoth had died at the tender young age of 16 after growing to be a sturdy six-and-a-half feet tall. The poor guy was missing a tusk, too, which scientists say probably contributed to his down fall. (The lack of tusk meant that it would’ve been hard for the young mammoth to defend itself against predators.) Some splits on the remaining tusk are indicative of human contact, leading the researchers to believe that it was indeed an Ice Age man who killed the mammoth some 20,000-30,000 years ago.
For more about Jenya's discovery and other recently recovered mammoths, check out the rest on Motherboard. Link
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When John Dolan was hospitalized, his dog Zander missed him so much that it decided to track him down to a hospital 2 miles away:
Zander, seemingly decided he had to be by his owner's bedside. Zander broke out of the Bay Shore home and made his way to the Good Samaritan Hospital Medical Center more than 2 miles away.
The four-legged friend likely went under the Robert Moses Parkway and across a busy four-lane road to get there. A hospital employee found the dog on the street outside of building where Dolan was being treated.
The Dolans got the 7-year-old husky from a shelter and nursed him back from starvation five years ago. Dolan says the dog has been like a son ever since.
The couple believes Zander traced John's scent to the hospital.
Adrienne Supino of Fox 5 News has the post: Link
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Portland On The Web: The Age, Post Gazette, USA Today
Another week, another country putting out a list of reasons to visit our fair city. But really, Australia? Fifty Shades of Grey is not a good reason to visit unless you're an extremely boring college co-ed or a millionaire who likes to tell women what they can and cannot eat.
You should come for the beer, however, as Portland has been added to yet another list of top beer cities. It's even the season for pumpkin beer, a welcome change from the beard-flavored ales of summertime.

Here is a round-up of the goings-on in Portland this week:
The Age: Twenty reasons to visit Portland
Eater: New cart pod slated for Central Eastside
Post Gazette: Portland, Ore. shows how it can be done with 500 food carts
Examiner: Inside Scoop: Oregon's Pumpkin Beers (Video)
OregonLive: Portland picks homegrown Alta Bicycle Share to run bike sharing
South Waterfront: Grimm season 2 filming locations map
Portland Plan: Portland Plan growing more diverse
USA Today: 10 Best Beer Cities in the World
Nick Fish: Waterfront Park in top 10 'Great Public Spaces'
Eater: 10 Most Iconic Portland Dining Rooms
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Celebrate Health from Health.comhttp://health.chtah.net/a/tBQbHw0BFYNexB8uY$jCFNC1EEK/hol2

25 BREAST CANCER MYTHS DEBUNKED
http://health.chtah.net/a/tBQbHw0BFYNexB8uY$jCFNC1EEK/hol23
In 2012 alone, breast cancer will claim the lives of more then 39,000 people in the U.S., a scary, but eye-opening statistic. It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month, so what better time to stay informed?
10 CELEBS WHO BATTLED BREAST CANCER Famous women who fought cancer while in the public eyehttp://health.chtah.net/a/tBQbHw0BFYNexB8uY$jCFNC1EEK/hol24
THINK PINK Support breast cancer research with these buys (or donations!)http://health.chtah.net/a/tBQbHw0BFYNexB8uY$jCFNC1EEK/hol25
CUT YOUR RISK TODAY 5 simple things that can lower your cancer riskhttp://health.chtah.net/a/tBQbHw0BFYNexB8uY$jCFNC1EEK/hol26
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That’s what you call a quickie.
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Schrödinger's Cat is Alive!
Hooray for science! Berkeley physicists have managed to probe the state of a quantum object without collapsing it - the equivalent of taking a peek at Schrödinger's cat without killing it:
Researchers had suggested it should be possible, in principle, to make measurements that are "gentle" enough not to destroy the superposition. The idea was to measure something less direct than whether the bit is a 1 or a 0 – the equivalent of looking at Schrödinger's cat through blurry glasses. This wouldn't allow you to gain a "strong" piece of information – whether the cat was alive or dead – but you might be able to detect other properties.
Now, R. Vijay of the University of California, Berkeley, and colleagues have managed to create a working equivalent of those blurry glasses. "We only partially open the box," says Vijay.
Because this is quantum physics, however, such an action comes with a price, which you can read over at The New Scientist: Link
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It began as an April Fools prank, but someone (somewhere, maybe) will be happy to know that Rocky Mountain Oyster Stout is now a real thing.
According to representatives from Wynkoop Brewing, the phony product was met with such a warm reception back in April that the company had no choice but to start brewing it for real.
And by God, these fiends have done it: brewing a beer that according to the Wynkoop website, is “an assertive foreign-style stout, slightly viscous, with a deep brown color. It has equally deep flavors of chocolate syrup, Kahlua, and espresso, along with a palpable level of alcohol and a savory umami-like note. It finishes dry and roasted with a fast-fading hop bite.”
Given that description, Wynkoop's nutty brew seems drinkable. Not that I'll be going near it ever. Link
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San Francisco to Ban Public Nudity
San Francisco ain't gonna be the same ever again. Supervisor and party pooper Scott Wiener has proposed a legislation to ban public nudity in the let-it-all-hang-out Californian city:
Wiener on Tuesday proposed legislation that would ban the exposure of genitals or buttocks on all city sidewalks, plazas, parklets, streets and public transit. [...]
At Jane Warner Plaza at Castro and Market streets on Tuesday, the clothed sun worshipers were mostly relieved to hear that the Castro district's famous "naked guys" could soon be forced to be just regular, pants-wearing guys. As many as a dozen nudists gather almost daily in the neighborhood's town square.
"To me, it's uncivilized," griped Lawrence Snyder, a 70-year-old retiree who likes to read the newspaper at least once a week in the plaza. "Even the cavemen wore a little bit of fur, a little bit of leather."
Heather Knight of San Francisco Chronicle has the story: Link (Photo: Beck Diefenbach/SF Chronicle)
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Beekeepers in northeastern France have been alarmed to find their bees producing honey in unnatural shades of green and blue.
The beekeepers believe the source of the problem is a biogas plant close to Ribeauville in Alsace.
“We discovered the problem at the same time [the beekeepers] did. We quickly put in place a procedure to stop it,” Philippe Meinrad, a spokesman from Agrivalor, the company operating the biogas plant…
The company, which deals with waste from a Mars chocolate factory, said it would clean out the containers, store all incoming waste in airtight containers and process it promptly, according to a company statement published in Le Monde newspaper…
A spokeswoman for the British Beekeepers’ Association, Gill Maclean, said it was possible that the coloured sugar could have contaminated the honey…
“Bees are clever enough to know where the best sources of sugar are, if there are no others available,” she said
The beekeepers say their blue honey is unsellable. Boy, are they wrong. Advertise it on the Web and crazy people like me would buy it. Use it for topping vanilla ice cream or some silly cupcake. Probably could sell the entire inventory to some breakfast chain.
Thanks Ed ~ I'd buy it too
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Obama-Romney Presidential Debate Drinking Game!

The Mitt Romney/Barack Obama debates are finally here - which means it's time for the 2012 Presidential Debate Drinking Games! So stock up on your favorite beverages, follow us on Twitter and check back here before each debate to drink along with us.

Upcoming Presidential Debates

October 3 - Presidential Debate
Barack Obama - Mitt Romney
Moderated by Jim Lehrer
Topic - Domestic Policy
October 11 - Vice Presidential Debate
Joe Biden-Paul Ryan
Moderated by Martha Raddatz
Topic - Domestic & Foreign Policy
October 16 - Presidential Debate
Barack Obama - Mitt Romney
Moderated by Candy Crowley
Format - Town Hall
October 22 - Presidential Debate
Barack Obama - Mitt Romney
Moderated by Bob Schieffer
Topic - Foreign Policy

Debate Bingo

It’s another debate drinking game!
Debate bingo
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Simon's Cat in Springtime
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Alcoholic Pizza
If you want to order the new pizza at Salvatore's, you'll have to show ID to prove that you're at least 21. That's because the Boston eatery is now serving pizza that's cooked with vodka. Chef Victor Paone describes it:
“We got some dried Italian cherries, and we cooked them, and they were too tough,” Paone told the Herald. “Obviously, we had to soak them a little, so I decided to soak them in raspberry vodka.”
The result was Vignola Cherry Pizza, which also is topped with fresh mozzarella, Gorgonzola, prosciutto and orange blossom honey. [...]
Two more 21-plus pies will be added to Salvatore’s menu in mid-October. The Drunken Pig comes with Kahlua-marinated braised pork, ricotta cheese, caramelized Granny Smith apples, mozzarella cheese and spicy hot honey, while Calabria Peach is topped with rum-infused fresh peaches, mascarpone, soppressata picante, fresh mozzarella and basil.
Link -via That's Nerdalicious! | Photo: Ted Fitzgerald
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The Elephant Rope

As a man was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a small rope tied to their front leg. No chains, no cages. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime, break away from their bonds but for some reason, they did not.

He saw a trainer nearby and asked why these animals just stood there and made
no attempt to get away. "Well," trainer said, "when they are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them and, at that age, it's enough to hold them. As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free."

The man was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their bonds but because they believed they couldn't, they were stuck right where they were.

Like the elephants, how many of us go through life hanging onto a belief that we cannot do something, simply because we failed at it once before?

Failure is part of learning; we should never give up the struggle in life.
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Bond Gadgets Stand Test Of Time (But Not Physics)
James Bond — the film franchise, that is — is turning 50. But if 007 is getting up there in years, his gadgets will never get old. Throughout the series, the creators have always come up with wild gear for Bond to bring along on his missions — while often taking a lot more creative license than they might have needed. They've come up with pieces that were inventive and prescient at best, impossible in the real world at worst, as astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson tells NPR's David Greene.
Got five minutes? A riff on Bond gadgets: http://n.pr/PSC8YW
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Many cities and towns around the world have a link to another city or town far away, for friendship and cultural exchanges. The village of Glenelg, on the western coast of Scotland, has announced it will “twin” with another place with the same name. Glenelg, Mars, is the designated name of the spot that the Mars Curiosity rover is headed toward.
The valley of Glenelg has been so-called for two reasons.

Firstly, the robot will visit the location twice on its journey to and from a Martian mountain, Mount Sharp, and this coming and going inspired the rover team to use a palindrome, a word which reads the same forwards and backwards.

Secondly, all features around the crater being examined have been given names associated with a place called Yellowknife in northern Canada, where Glenelg is the name of a geological feature.
Officials in Glenelg, the Scottish one, announced that an official “twinning” ceremony will take place on October 20th. Although there will be no Martian natives at the ceremony, American astronaut Bonnie Dunbar will attend. Link-via Arbroath
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The spot where three continents converge is the most-disputed (and some say most valuable) real estate on Earth. Nine Paley is working on a full project (called Seder-Masochism) on the history of the Holy Land (Israel/Canaan/Palestine/the Levant), and this clip is envisioned as the final scene. See a list of who kills who at her website. Link -via Boing Boing
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How does marijuana affect your brain? Here's the totally non-political neurochemistry explanation from AsapSCIENCE. Written by Mitchell Moffit and Gregory Brown. -via The Daily What Geek
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You already know that Maru loves boxes, but did you know it doesn't matter what size or shape it is, he doesn't care how long the box is or how thin? Maru will be happy.
Via I Can Has Cheezburger
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fOn October 5, 1962, a 45rpm single was released called "Love Me Do," with "P.S. I Love You" on the B-side. It was the very first Beatles single, and it peaked at #17 on the British pop charts. The song went to #1 in the U.S. two years later. The song, written by teenagers John Lennon and Paul McCartney years earlier, was pretty nondescript compared to their later music, but it marked the beginning of a decade-long phenomenon in pop music. The Beatles reached unprecedented popularity in the music industry and are to this day the best-selling band in history. Link -via Metafilter

To celebrate this milestone, we present some of the many posts we've done on the Beatles for your edification and entertainment.

Neatorama presents Beatlemania Week
The Day John Lennon Met Paul McCartney
The Origin of the Beatles Haircut
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The Sunflower Star is a starfish with up to 26 arms -and it can grow up to a meter wide! Those little waving "feet"? It can have up to 15,000 of those, which they use to draw its prey near enough to eat. The Vancouver Aquarium tells us how it eats: The sunflower star also uses those tube feet to pry a live clam (its favourite food) apart before pushing its stomach out of its mouth and inside the clam, digesting the hapless clam in its own shell (the sunflower star digests its food outside of its body) Link -via the Presurfer
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Now, if Steven Spielberg had been able to get his shark to jump completely out of the water like this one, he may have had a hit movie on his hands! Enjoy a scene from the action-packed Bollywood version of Jaws. The top YouTube comment says it all: "We're gonna need a bigger budget." -via Cynical-C
86. RANDY PAUSCH: The brick walls
RANDY PAUSCH: The brick walls
Randy Pausch (1960-2008) was a computer-science and human-computer interaction professor at Carnegie Mellon University. After being diagnosed with terminal cancer and given only 3-6 months to live, he gave a now-famous speech called The Last Lecture: Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams. The lecture is a fun and inspiring account of how Pausch achieved (most of) his childhood dreams, from experiencing zero gravity to working for Disney. After being uploaded on YouTube, the talk went viral and Pausch went on to appear on Oprah and write a best-selling book.
Watch the video here. It’s pretty inspiring, and the man’s positivity while living with the knowledge he’s going to die has to be seen to be believed.
When I started this site, my little Shaolin Monk character was meant to appear in lots of comics. Surprisingly, this is only his second appearance. Here’s the first one way back in the third comic.
~ Zen Pencils
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How cool is it to break the sound barrier? THAT cool!
Seeing the video above makes you remember that life beats movies, no matter what. The sound barrier is the speed at which a vehicle need to fly/run in order to beat the speed of sound (1,236 kilometres per hour or 768 mph at sea level, via wiki). And it looks pretty darn awesome, let me add.
UPDATE: What you see in the video above is the compression wave that occurs at transonic speeds, from Mach 0.8 to Mach 1.0. The aircraft doesn’t break the sound barrier so close to the viewers. In airshows and so close to people it is not allowed. Thanks to the commenters of this post for this info.
During 1950s the sound barrier has been definitely defeated by human. Kinda feeling proud of those aircrafts, like FA-18 “Super Hornet”, from the images above. Currently, war aircrafts reach easily Mach 2. Cool. Via [One Cool Thing A Day].
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"Smart" people (IQ > 125) are more likely to consume psychoactive drugs than low-IQ people. Here's why
10 scientific and technological visionaries who experimented with drugs
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Here’s a familiar idea — in 1820 an enterprising Englishman advertised “an establishment where persons of all classes who are anxious to sweeten life by repairing to the altar of Hymen, have an opportunity of meeting with proper partners.” If you were seeking a mate you’d sign up by a paying a fee according to your desirability; the handbill gives these rather blunt examples:
Ladies.
1st Class. I am twenty years of age, heiress to an estate in the county of Essex of the value of 30,000l., well educated, and of domestic habits; of an agreeable, lively disposition, and genteel figure. Religion that of my future husband.
2nd Class. I am thirty years of age, a widow, in the grocery line in London — have children; of middle stature, full made, fair complexion and hair, temper agreeable, worth 3,000l.
3rd Class. I am tall and thin, a little lame in the hip, of a lively disposition, conversible, twenty years of age, live with my father, who, if I marry with his consent, will give me 1,000l.
4th Class. I am twenty years of age; mild disposition and manners; allowed to be personable.
5th Class. I am sixty years of age; income limited; active, and rather agreeable.
Gentlemen.
1st Class. A young gentleman with dark eyes and hair; stout made; well educated; have an estate of 500l. per annum in the county of Kent; besides 10,000l. in three per cent. consolidated annuities; am of an affable disposition, and very affectionate.
2nd Class. I am forty years of age, tall and slender, fair complexion and hair, well tempered and of sober habits, have a situation in the Excise, of 300l. per annum, and a small estate in Wales of the annual value of 150l.
3rd Class. A tradesman in the city of Bristol, in a ready-money business, turning 150l. per week at a profit of 10 per cent., pretty well tempered, lively, and fond of home.
4th Class. I am fifty-eight years of age; a widower, without encumbrance; retired from business upon a small income ; healthy constitution; and of domestic habits.
5th Class. I am twenty-five years of age; a mechanic of sober habits; industrious, and of respectable connections.
“The subscribers are to be furnished with a list of descriptions, and when one occurs likely to suit, the parties may correspond; and if mutually approved, the interview may be afterwards arranged.”
I can’t tell how well it succeeded. “It is presumed that the public will not find any difficulty in describing themselves; if they should, they will have the assistance of the managers, who will be in attendance at the office, No. 5, Great St. Helens, Bishopsgate Street, on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, between the hours of eleven and three o’clock. — Please to inquire for Mr. Jameson, up one pair of stairs. All letters to be post paid.”
(From Henry Sampson, A History of Advertising from the Earliest Times, 1875.)
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It's the perfect shot glass for bacon vodka and you can learn to make your own thanks to ManBQue -just make sure you actually cook them all the way through because no one wants to be sickened with ecoli while suffering from a hangover Link Via Geekosystem
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Tim Burton's new movie in Feed My Frankenweenie.
The Secret of Humphrey Bogart's Distinctive Voice.

Halloween Costumes From Yesteryear, presented on our Halloween blog.

10 Landmark Moments in Animation History, by way of mental_floss magazine.

How to Write a Scientific Research Report reposted from the Annals of Improbable Research.
Don't miss the "English translation" link at the end.
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Star Wars at the Coronet Theater
Did you happen to go see Star Wars on its opening weekend in San Francisco in 1977? Peter Hartlaub of the San Francisco Chronicle found and posted photos of the crowds at the Coronet Theater waiting to see the new film Star Wars, and he wants to find those folks. Even if you weren't there, you'll want to see the pictures. Oh, and you'll definitely get a kick out of the newspaper ads for the movie -one describes Darth Vader as a metallic star creature. Link -via Laughing Squid
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FoldsFive became known around the internet for the pixel .gif versions of all the Star Wars films (well, the three good ones, at least). Now they've put together an animated .gif version of Raiders of the Lost Ark. The whole movie, right here. Enjoy! See the sequels, too, at PixelMash. Link -via Blame It On The Voices
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Here's a recipe for a sweet treat that almost looks too gross to eat, but is sure to delight even the most discriminating Halloweenies. Now you too can follow the link below and learn how to make your own peanut butter eyeball truffles, with white chocolate frosting and an oozing cherry center just like a real eyeball...
Frosted peanut butter eyeballs - they're horrifyingly delicious Link
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In order to participate in the NYC Blackout Haunted House experience, you must be over 18, you must go through the entire experience alone, you must sign a waiver, you must be willing to be touched, and you must be out of your mind. I couldn't miss a chance to participate in what was being called the scariest haunted house of all times.
Rules
YOU MUST WALK THROUGH ALONE.
You must be over 18.
Stay on the marked path at all times.
You will be prompted to do certain actions. Please do exactly as you're told. This is for your safety.
There is absolutely no speaking allowed inside. You can, however, scream as loud as you'd like.
Do not ever touch the actors.
Do not ever touch the walls.
You must wear a protective mask and carry a flashlight at all times. (We will provide both of these items for you. Please do not bring your own.)
If you have an emergency while walking through the house and need to be escorted out, please yell the word "SAFETY" as loud as you can. Stay where you are, remain calm, and someone will come to get you and bring you out. Once you call "SAFETY", there are no refunds and there are no options but to leave.
Please be aware, you will encounter:
FOG – STROBE LIGHTS – COMPLETE DARKNESS
CRAWLING – STAIRS – LOUD NOISES – WATER
PHYSICAL CONTACT – SEXUAL and VIOLENT SITUATIONS
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Stop acting so small.
You are the universe in ecstatic motion.

~ Rumi image: Mario Moreno
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Watch a PSA about CPR, by Splice director Vincenzo Natali, with zombies
How does one adequately convey the importance of CPR? If you're the Heart and Stroke Foundation of Canada, you recruit Cube, Splice, and future Neuromancer director Vincenzo Natali for a post-apocalyptic survival saga. With multiple twists, no less! [The Undeading via MeFi]
If you ever have to give CPR, an important rule of thumb is to pump the chest to the rhythm of Stayin' Alive by the Bee Gees. Seriously! "Ah, ah, ah, ah - stayin' alive! Stayin' Alive!" Quite literally about two beats a second.
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Learn how to peel a head of garlic in less than 10 seconds!
http://www.kitchendaily.com/read/how-peel-head-garlic-less-10-seconds?ncid=bannaduskitc00000002
Saveur magazine's Todd Coleman shows you how to peel garlic in less than ten seconds. No knife necessary! Peeling the skin off garlic to get to its rich goodness can be a tedious task when prepping a meal. Separating the cloves with a knife just doesn't cut it when it comes to a time crunch, and simply, it isn't always safe. Check out the video above to learn how to peel garlic in less than 10 seconds. And if that isn't enough garlic for you, check out 7 Reasons to Eat Garlic.
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Straight ballet dancer
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These fall recipes are flavorful, filling and a perfect complement for the cooler weather. Rustic vegetables, heartwarming soups and hearty meats and casseroles will not only fill you up, but make great meals for your family and friends. Discover 20 hearty fall recipes in the slideshow above. Whether you're looking for the perfect pork chop or just a classic meatloaf, we've got you covered for autumn. Warm up your kitchen with seasonal favorites! We're giving you the first look at our collection of hearty fall recipes featuring fresh, seasonal ingredients. From Maple-Pecan Pie to Roast Pork with Green Apples and Golden Squash, we've got you covered for the coming autumn season. For more fall recipes, try our Chocolate-Swirled Pumpkin Pie, Hot Chocolate orChocolate-Gingerbread Cookies.
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If you choose 'antibacterial' products because you think they kill more germs, think again. According to recent studies, antiseptic ingredients added to numerous products are not effective and may actually be harmful.

In 2005, an FDA panel concluded that there is no added benefit from using antimicrobial products over plain soap and water. There's also toxicity to consider. One of the most popular antimicrobials, the pesticide triclocarban (TCC), defies water treatment methods.

Once it's flushed down drains, about 75 percent of TCC makes it through treatments and it ends up in our surface water and in municipal sludge. This sludge is regularly applied to U.S. crop fields as a fertilizer, meaning the chemical could potentially accumulate in our food.

So if it's not more helpful, and can even be harmful, why bother with it? Scroll down to find out some alternatives.
* Many personal care products these days read off like a chemistry lesson. Thankfully, there are plenty of more natural alternatives like vegetarian soap.

* In most commercial soap making processes, at the end of the process what's left is the basic soap product and glycerine. The glycerine is a useful emollient and is often sold separately as a moisturizer. This is rather ironic as soap with glycerine removed can dry out your skin.

* Vegetarian soaps contain no animal products. They are made with plant oils and natural fragrances only and the glycerine is usually left in.

* Most brands of vegetarian soap are comparable in price to larger name brands and in some cases they are even cheaper.
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Can you decipher the following common phrase?

T M C
A U O
H S M
W T E

ANSWER: What goes up, must come down.
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QUOTE: "Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save."

HINT: (1879-1935), American cowboy, vaudeville performer, humorist, social commentator and motion picture actor.

ANSWER: Will Rogers.
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Size matters2
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RANDOM TIDBITS

Richard Starkey began using the stage name Ringo Starr in 1958 when he was drummer for a group known as the Raving Texans, and part of the appeal was the Old West flavor of the "Ringo" nickname.

Saturn's rings are by far the most visible, but rings also surround the other outer planets - Jupiter, Uranus, and Neptune.

When the Great Depression hit, jewelry makers did what they could to stay afloat in an era when displays of wealth were frowned upon. For engagement rings, this involved designing multifaceted settings for diamonds that made the stones appear much larger than they actually were, keeping them affordable.

The combined cost of the three Lord of the Rings films exceeded $300 million, and investors were wary of the risk involved. The worldwide box office take for the three films, of course, proved most pleasing to everyone involved in the project. The total was just short of $3 billion, making it the top movie trilogy of all time.

Of the more than 500 "active" volcanoes on Earth, three quarters of them lie in an area called the "Ring of Fire" that forms a chain around the Pacific Ocean. The area includes western North and South America, from Alaska all the way to Chile.

In 1913, IOC founder Pierre de Coubertin designed the Olympic logo still in use today, depicting five inter-locking rings of blue, yellow, black, green, and red. The rings represent (in no particular order) the continents participating in the games: Africa, America, Asia, Australia, and Europe.
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In 1919, the mother of 9-year-old Samuel Barber found this letter on his desk:
NOTICE to Mother and nobody else
Dear Mother: I have written this to tell you my worrying secret. Now don’t cry when you read it because it is neither yours nor my fault. I suppose I will have to tell it now without any nonsense. To begin with I was not meant to be an athlet [sic]. I was meant to be a composer, and will be I’m sure. I’ll ask you one more thing. — Don’t ask me to try to forget this unpleasant thing and go play football. — Please — Sometimes I’ve been worrying about this so much that it makes me mad (not very)
Love,
Sam Barber II
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The Knitted Boyfriend
Noortje de Keijzer's My Knitted Boyfriend is a treat. It's the tale of a young woman who wanted a boyfriend, so she knitted one from yarn. He's perfect in every way: funny, kind, romantic and machine washable. The visual effects and set design are a hoot Link -via Craft
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A massive LEGO art vampire was built in New Orleans to officially usher in the Halloween season, and the fun part is- it was built by a crowd of people!
Here's more on this epic scale LEGO build:
LEGO kicked off the countdown to the Halloween season by inviting the New Orleans community to build a 12-foot tall LEGO vampire by the light of the full moon in the company’s first ever all night build. Set against the backdrop of Jackson Square and the St. Louis Cathedral, they built spooky Lego Lord Vampyre -- based on the lead villain from the new Monster Fighters line.
--via BoingBoing
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"Baseball is 90% mental, the other half is physical." - Yogi Berra
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"Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth." - Lillian Hellman
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"I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde
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Signs Your Car Might Be A Lemon --*

1. Motor Trend never mentioned a "Chevrolet Caca."
2. "Jaws of Life" in trunk.
3. Disqualified from Soapbox Derby for lack of structural integrity.
4. Turn on the wipers and two guys climb out of the trunk with squeegees.
5. Changing the pre-set radio stations voids the warranty.
6. Oil spills on your driveway prompt a visit from Greenpeace.
7. The telltale green-and-yellow-make-blue Zip-Lok seals on your air bags.
8. Car has spent more time on "60 Minutes" than on the road.
9. Manufactured in Zchkynk, Crzyktjkystan.
10. Bicycle pump required to inflate airbags.
(From Aha! Jokes)
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The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.
--Thomas Merton, "No Man Is An Island"
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I think we're at the most dangerous time in our political history in terms of the balance of power in the role that the media plays in whether or not we maintain a free democracy.--Pat Caddell, Democratic Pollster
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~~***DRACULA's DENTURES***~~

Here is all you need to make some of these Dracula Dentures:
Chocolate Chip Cookies
Vanilla or White Frosting
Red Food Coloring
Mini Marshmallows
Almond Sliver

Now watch how EASY these are to assemble…:

First you need to color your Frosting Red.
Then just cut your Chocolate Chip Cookie in Half.
Then Frost each Half with your Frosting.
Then on one of the halves stick on your Mini Marshmallows – Approx 6 around the front of the Cookie as shown.
Add an extra one in the back of that for stability. Then Place your other half on top.
Then take 2 Almond Slivers and stick them on and if needed you can dip the end into frosting to secure them. That is it – Now how cool is that?
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Learn to fail with pride - and do so fast and cleanly. Maximize trial and error - by mastering the error part.--Nassim Taleb, Author and Essayist
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"A new study in Norway says divorce rates are far higher when men help with the housework and much lower when women do all the chores. How many guys are going to jump on this study? 'Honey, I'd like to help with the housework but our marriage is more important.'" -Jay Leno
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While my parents were making their funeral arrangements, the cemetery salesman pointed out a plot that he thought they would like.
"You'll have a beautiful view of the swan pond," he assured them.
Dad wasn't sold: "Unless you're including a periscope with my casket, I don't know how I'm going to enjoy it."
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Don't you hate it when your food gets away from you like that? I love how into the grape he is and how kind his human is to give him a hand. Via I Can Has Cheezburger
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"No matter how low your own self-esteem, there are probably others who think less of you." --David S. Brown
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"If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?"
--Charles Pierce (1926-1999), American performance artist and famous female impressionist.
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Trinity College Library, Dublin, Ireland
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This time, the Gotye song is played by a band of gadgets! The vocals part is an HP Scanjet 3C. The rest comes from hard drives, oscilloscopes, computer parts, and a computer-driven glockenspiel. -via The Daily What Geek
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To oppose corruption in government is the highest obligation of patriotism.--G. Edward Griffin
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Take the course opposite to custom and you will almost always do well. --Rousseau
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Astronaut Jedi Training?
You're looking at NASA astronauts Frank Borman, Neil Armstrong, John Young and Deke Slayton channeling Jedi knights, all dressed up in robes made from parachutes (which would keep them cool in the day and warm at night) during a desert survival training in Nevada back in 1964.
Very stylish! Link- via Kuriositas
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"Security workers at JFK Airport are complaining that they don't have enough time to do their jobs thoroughly. Last time I flew, the TSA guy said, 'Uh, just grope yourself.'" --Jimmy Fallon
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A man must constantly exceed his level.~ Bruce Lee
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Usually, AXE deodorant body spray takes the low road of advertising. Their ads - humorous and effective as they are - can be summed up simply as (boobs) "use this to get chicks" (boobs).
But not this one.
Check out the "Susan Glenn" ad, as narrated by Kiefer Sutherland, and tell us if it's a better form of "macho" advertising than the usual: Hit play or go to Link [YouTube]
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QUOTE: "It is impossible to go through life without trust: That is to be imprisoned in the worst cell of all, oneself."
HINT: (1904-1991), English author, playwright and literary critic; Catholic religious themes are at the root of much of his writing, especially the four major Catholic novels: Brighton Rock, The Power and the Glory, The Heart of the Matter and The End of the Affair.
ANSWER: Graham Greene.
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RANDOM TIDBITS

In 2001, after hearing deterioration in his voice, listeners learned that conservative radio voice Rush Limbaugh was suffering from near-complete hearing loss. Cochlear implant surgery at year's end helped to improve both his hearing ability and thus his ability to enunciate properly.

Best known as red-haired, freckle-faced Danny on TV's The Partridge Family, Danny Bonaduce has found a second career as a radio personality. The job has sent him on a tour of the country, with stops in Philadelphia, Phoenix, Chicago, Detroit, New York, and Los Angeles, in that order.

Long-time Los Angeles disc jockey Jim Ladd provided the voice of the DJ for the 1987 album Radio KAOS by former Pink Floyd frontman Roger Waters. He also appeared in videos for the album's singles and traveled with Waters on tour, performing the role in concerts from a radio booth high above the stage.

When DJ Robert Smith first adopted the professional name Wolfman Jack, he shied away from public appearances because he couldn't decide how the Wolfman should look.

The Rest of the Story's radio legend Paul Harvey is credited with coining the words "guesstimate" and "Reaganomics."

Iva Ikuko Toguri was born in Los Angeles but found herself stranded in Tokyo while visiting relatives in 1941 after Pearl Harbor was bombed. She was drafted into work as a disc jockey for Radio Tokyo, and while the rest of the world called her Tokyo Rose, she only ever referred to herself as Orphan Ann.
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Colorblind
Are you colorblind? Have you ever wondered why colorblindness occurs? Do you think you are colorblind, but aren't sure? Well, this site has answers and explanations that will answer all these questions.
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"The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid" is roughly an autobiography of the author, Bill Bryson, but is more specifically a look at what life was like growing up in the midwest in the 1950s. Following is a hilarious excerpt...

Most things that were supposed to be fun turned out not to be fun at all. Model making, for instance. Making models was reputed to be hugely enjoyable but it was really just a mysterious ordeal that you had to go through from time to time as part of the boyhood process. The model kits looked fun. The illustrations on the boxes portrayed beautifully detailed fighter planes belching red-and-yellow flames from their wing guns and engaged in lively dogfights. In the background there was always a stricken Messerschmitt spiraling to earth. You couldn't wait to re-create such lively scenes in three dimensions.

But when you got the kit home and opened the box the contents turned out to be of a uniform leaden gray or olive green, consisting of perhaps sixty thousand tiny parts, some no larger than a proton, all attached in some organic, inseparable way to plastic stalks like swizzle sticks. The tubes of glue by contrast were the size of large pastry tubes. No matter how gently you depressed them they would blurp out a pint or so of a clear viscous goo whose one instinct was to attach itself to some foreign object--a human finger; the living room drapes, the fur of a passing animal--and become an infinitely long string.

Any attempt to break the string resulted in the creation of more strings. Within moments you would be attached to hundreds of sagging strands, all connected to something that had nothing to do with model airplanes or World War II. The only thing the glue wouldn't stick to, interestingly, was a piece of plastic model; then it just became a slippery lubricant that allowed any two pieces of model to glide endlessly over each other; never drying. The upshot was that after about forty minutes of intensive but troubled endeavor you and your immediate surroundings were covered in a glistening spider web of glue at the heart of which was a gray fuselage with one wing on upside down and a pilot accidentally but irremediable attached by his flying cap to the cockpit ceiling. Happily by this point you were so high on the glue that you didn't give a shoot about the pilot, the model, or anything else.
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Seabiscuit - Actual Radio Broadcast: 1940 Santa Anita Handicaphttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTgCJDefFrE
Seabiscuit was a champ thoroughbred race horse. From an inauspicious start, Seabiscuit became an unlikely champion and a symbol of hope to many Americans during the Great Depression. Watch and listen to an actual radio broadcast from 1940.
The mighty Seabiscuit wins the treasured Big Cap and becomes the richest horse in the world at that time.
Movie stars and other celebrities loved Santa Anita. This video is quite the piece of nostalgia.
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For more information, enlarge the photograph.
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The presidential election is really heating up with the big debates kicking off this week. So let's take a closer look at the grand tradition of the U.S. presidency.

Random Facts:

The oldest president inaugurated was Reagan (age 69); the youngest was Kennedy (age 43). Theodore Roosevelt, however, was the youngest man to become president: he was 42 when he succeeded McKinley, who had been assassinated.

Vice presidents were originally the presidential candidates receiving the second-largest number of electoral votes. The Twelfth Amendment, passed in 1804, changed the system so that the electoral college voted separately for president and vice president. The presidential candidate, however, gradually gained power over the nominating convention to choose his own running mate.

Can you imagine if John McCain had been elected Obama's vice president?
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Another puzzle from Henry Dudeney:
“It is a glorious game!” an enthusiast was heard to exclaim. “At the close of last season, of the footballers of my acquaintance, four had broken their left arm, five had broken their right arm, two had the right arm sound, and three had sound left arms.” Can you discover from that statement what is the smallest number of players that the speaker could be acquainted with?
The smallest possible number of men is seven. They could be accounted for in three different ways. (1) Two with both arms sound, one with broken right arm, and four with both arms broken. (2) One with both arms sound, one with broken left arm, two with broken right arm, and three with both arms broken. (3) Two with left arm broken, three with right arm broken, and two with both arms broken. But if every man was injured, the last case is the only one that would apply.
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"For sale," read the ad in our hospital's weekly newsletter, "sleeveless wedding gown, white, size 8, veil included. Worn once, by mistake."
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When hiring new staff at the public library, I always ask applicants what sort of supervision they'd be most comfortable with. One genius answered, "I've always thought Superman's X-ray vision would be cool."
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My niece was thrilled to hear that a new car wash was opening up right in her neighborhood. "How convenient," she said. "I can walk to it!"
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My wife cannot ride in a car without telling whoever is driving what to do, when to do it, etc. She is, bar none, the worst back seat driver in the world. I have long thought this, though she would deny it. She claimed she seldom, if ever made comments about my driving. I, of course, claimed the opposite. Now I have proof.
The other day we were headed for the mall and my daughter piped up, "Daddy, before you married Mommy, who told you how to drive?"
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If thou wilt make a man happy, add not unto his riches but take away from his desires.--Epicurus
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He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.--Nietzsche
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It is better, of course, to know useless things than to know nothing. --Seneca
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Use only that which works, and take it from any place you can find it.--Bruce Lee
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We cannot truly plan, because we do not understand the future--but this is not necessarily bad news. We could plan while bearing in mind such limitations. It just takes guts.~ Nassim Taleb, Author and Essayist
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"You know when it comes to organic food, the USDA is very tough. You can't have anything that ends in 'eetos.'" -Craig Ferguson
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"A new survey found that 55 percent of men expect to pay on the first date. While the other 45 percent have never been on a second date." -Jimmy Fallon
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"Pizza Hut has unveiled their newest pizza. It's a pizza with a crust made out of cream cheese-filled cones. They're calling it the Autopsy Lovers Pizza." -Conan O'Brien
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How very intimate the bodily sense is can be seen by performing a little experiment in your imagination. Think first of swallowing the saliva in your mouth, or do so. Then imagine expectorating it into a tumbler and drinking it! What seemed natural and ‘mine’ suddenly becomes disgusting and alien. Or picture yourself sucking blood from a prick in your finger; then imagine sucking blood from a bandage around your finger! What I perceive as belonging intimately to my body is warm and welcome; what I perceive as separate from my body becomes, in the twinkling of an eye, cold and foreign.
– Gordon W. Allport, Becoming: Basic Considerations for a Psychology of Personality, 1960
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Upset over a newlywed squabble with my husband, I went to my mother to complain. Trying to console me, my dad said that men are not all like this all the time.

"Nonsense," I said, inconsolable. "Men are good for only one thing!"

"Yes," my mother interjected, "but how often do you have to parallel park?"

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My son, Scott, an insurance broker in Florida, loves ocean fishing and takes his cell phone along on the boat. One morning we were drifting about ten miles offshore as Scott discussed business on the phone.

Suddenly his rod bent double, and the reel screamed as line poured off the spool. Scott was master of the situation. "Pardon me," he told his customer calmly. "I have a call on another line."
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Crossword puzzles
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"Officers contacted two intoxicated fisherman who were engaged in a deadly serious game of tug-of-war with a purple tutu, which both of them claimed as their own. Officers suggested they drop both the tutu and the argument, as it hardly seemed worth going to jail over such a flimsy issue."
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QUOTE: "Nothing is permanent in this wicked world - not even our troubles."


HINT: (1889-1977), English comic actor, film director and composer best known for his work during the silent film era.
ANSWER: Charlie Chaplin.
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RANDOM TIDBITS

While most believe that "The Purple People Eater" is a purple creature that eats people, the novelty hit song's lyrics reveal a different story. In them, the rock 'n' roll monster reveals that he enjoys "eatin' purple people." Fans are divided on the issue.

George Washington first offered the Badge for Military Merit, better known as the Purple Heart. It was originally a heart-shaped cloth patch attached to the uniform. In 1932, to commemorate the bicentennial of Washington's birth, the award was reintroduced as a medal presented to U.S. military personnel injured during combat.

The author of Harold and the Purple Crayon felt that his name might be too difficult for youngsters to pronounce properly, so David Leisk published the popular children's book under the pen name Crockett Johnson.

Those who disliked the Barney the Dinosaur character came up with all sorts of hateful nicknames for the character, perhaps the most bizarre of which was "The Purple Antichrist."

Where are the "purple mountain majesties" referred to in the patriotic song "America, the Beautiful?" Katharine Lee Bates wrote the lyrics in 1893 when she viewed her surroundings from the summit of Pike's Peak.

Porphyrophobia is defined as the irrational and persistent fear of the color purple.
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Purple Hippo - The Thong Song
http://archive.evtv1.com/player.aspx?itemnum=5834
Come watch this adorable cartoon of a purple hippo as she busts out her best dance moves to the hit song 'The Thong Song.' Safe for kids and work.
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A high-school student came home from school seeming rather depressed.
"What's the matter, son," asked his mother.
"Aw, gee," said the boy, "It's my grades. They're all wet."
"What do you mean 'all wet?'"
"I mean," he replied, "below C-level."
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A very homely person made an appointment with a psychiatrist. The homely person walked into the doctor's office and said, "Doctor, I'm so depressed and lonely. I don't have any friends, no one will come near me, and everybody laughs at me. Can you help me accept my ugliness?"

"I'm sure I can." the psychiatrist replied. "Just go over and lie face down on that couch."
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A college couple is under a tree on campus making out. After a while, the girl says, "I wish you had a flashlight."
He says, "Why's that?"
She says, "Because you've been eating grass for fifteen minutes."
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Note: A second video (same topic) will play after the first one.
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Little old Mr. Ravelli is on his front stoop, barbequeing a chicken on a manual rotisserie.
A drunk comes walking along and says, "Hey, man...the music stopped, and your monkey's on fire."
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I was once in a nice family-style restaurant when I observed some kids supergluing the dishes to the table. They also attached the silverware, napkins, salt, pepper, etc. If it wasn't already nailed down, it was now. They stayed long enough to let the glue set, and then paid and left. They watched as the poor busboy tried to get the stuff off of the table.

Also funny is supergluing a quarter to the sidewalk. I know its old, but in the city, with the diverse types of people around, it gets really amusing. I watched this old lady whack at it with her cane for about 10 min.
cursing......
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There's good looking CG animation and then there's The Butterfly Effect, a short that is so gorgeous I want to tell the creators Dan Sumich and Passion Pictures to reel it in a bit, because they're making everybody else look bad! It's about a guy having a particularly bad day, let's just leave it at that... --via Cartoon Brew
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Flood Fill is a simple game that gets maddeningly difficult as soon as you think you've got the hang of it. The point is to assign colors to a grid and not have any color blocks touch the same color. Good luck! Link -via mentalfloss
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Q and A Quickies

Q: Who won the Franco Prussian War?
A: James Franco!

Q: What does Godzilla drive?
A: A monster truck!

Q: Why shouldn't you tell secrets in a cornfield?
A: There are too many ears!
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I tried this once. She seemed to enjoy it and the kids got a big kick out of it. Especially when she ran under the coffee table and broke my nose.
Thanks Ursa. I'm beginning to feel like a regular Ernest Hemminphlaxgway.
Doggy style
Thanx Phlax ~ you continue to amuse & amaze me
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Happy Birthday NASA (and Neil deGrasse Tyson)!!
Dr. Tyson and NASA share a birthday, more or less. Both were born in the first week of October, 1958. To celebrate NASA and Neil’s 54th year in existence, here is the inspirational astrophysicist’s appeal to the U.S. Senate’s Committee on Commerce, Science and Transportation on the utter necessity of space exploration … not only to the health of our economy and our technology, but also to our culture. When he showed up in Washington earlier this year to talk to them, only about half the committee showed up to listen. But as a nation, we would all do well to turn our ears in the direction of people like Neil. As a birthday present to them both, let’s keep doing what we can to push science forward with the coming generations. (via Brain Pickings)
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The Answer: A Cockrobin.
The Question: What are you putting in my mouth, Batman?
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A stockbroker catches his wife in bed with another man. He says to her, "What's going on?"
She says, "Believe it or not, John, I've gone public!"
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
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The beer is flowing and carnival rides running again at this year’s 179th Oktoberfest in Munich. Known as the world's largest beer festival, the event dates to 1810 when Crown Prince Ludwig was married to Princess Therese and the people of Munich were invited to attend the festivities. More than 6 million people are expected to attend this year’s festival, which runs until Oct. 7. -- NOTE: We're going to be asking some viewers of The Big Picture to answer one or two anonymous survey questions before viewing the full post or you can choose to send a tweet or Facebook post instead. ( 31 photos total)
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This guy was driving down the highway and was pulled over by the cops. The cop asked the man for his name and the guy replied, "Earl."
"You got a last name, Earl?"
"Nope. It's a long story, Officer."
"I got time."
Earl sighs and says, "Well, Officer, at first I was known as Earl Doo-Daa. I was going to school to become a doctor, and I did, so I was known as Earl Doo-Daa, MD. I got bored just being a doctor so I went to dental school, graduated, and became Earl Doo-Daa, M.D., D.D. After a little more time I fooled around with this girl and got VD. So I was known as Earl Doo-Daa, MD, DD, with VD. When the medical board found out about my VD they took away my MD so I was known as Earl Doo-Daa, DD with VD. The dentistry board also found out about the VD and took away my DD making me Earl Doo-Dah with VD. Finally, the VD took away my Doo-Dah so I'm now just Earl."
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These colorful, blobby creatures, called Flossis, are taking over Germany. Designed by artist Rosalie, the installation of playful figures can be seen climbing the exterior walls of many buildings in Düsseldorf, Germany.
The decorative figures add a fun element along The Rhine, as viewers observe the invasion of the human-like forms who fearlessly climb the walls with their suction cup hands and feet. Upon reaching the top of the building, the happy clan of sculptures are placed standing or sitting, with legs hanging over the edge of the roof, happily waving down to the audience of passers-by below.
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A shipwreck, a lost forest, a Roman villa, an ancient crater, pyramids and yes, even Atlantis.
10 Amazing Google Earth And Maps Discoveries.
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New York will get a new attraction alongside the Statue of Liberty and the Empire State Building: The world's largest Ferris wheel. This giant Ferris wheel will be located on the northeastern side of Staten Island. Constuction is expected to begun in April 2014 with a target operational commencement at the end of 2015.
The capacity of the New York Wheel will be 36 passenger capsules carrying up to 40 passengers each and a total maximum capacity of 1,440 people per ride. The Wheel expects up to 30,000 riders per day and about 4.5 million passengers per year.
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"A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't." - Rhonda Hansome
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Anatomy is something everybody's got, but sure looks better on a man*.
*(Yes, I changed it to my preference)
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Broken promises don't upset me. I just think 'Why did they believe me?'
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This bloke picks up woman at the local pub. They go for a romantic walk down the street. They walk hand in hand and as they stroll his lustful desires rise to a fever pitch. He is just about to put the hard word on her when she says, "I hope you don't mind but I'm busting to have a piss".
Slightly taken aback by this vulgarity he replies, "OK why don't you go behind these bushes".
She nods in agreement and disappears behind the bushes.
As he waits he can hear the sound of nylon knickers rolling down her voluptuous legs and imagines what is being exposed. Unable to contain himself for another moment, he reaches through a gap in the foliage, his hand touching her leg. He quickly brings his hand further up her thigh until suddenly he finds himself gripping a long,
thick appendage hanging between her legs.
He shouts in horror "My God, don't tell me your really a bloke!".
"No" she replies", "I've changed my mind, I'm having a shit instead."
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A weary old lecher named Blott
Took a luscious young blonde on his yacht.
Too lazy to rape her,
He made darts out of paper,
Which he leisurely tossed at her twat.
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Chicago from across Lake Michigan

Here’s a really cool picture taken from a beach in Indiana. Click to enlarge
Chicago pic from indiana
Is that not just the coolest picture?
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A young sky diver named Sherm
jumped out with his cock long and firm
two jerks and a spasm,
he had an orgasm
and spelled out "I love you" in sperm.
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I assure you that is not the tagline of a bad, straight-to-DVD sci-fi film. In case there are one or two people left out there who are unaware of the awesomeness that is cephalopod intelligence, I give you an octopus stealing food from a bait canister while holding a shark at bay as if it were an annoying little brother. “Yo shark, imma let you continue to be apex predator among fishes, but I’m the most supremely intelligent invertebrate of all time.” (via Deep Sea News)
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Attorney to witness: "And where was the location of the accident?"
Witness: "Approximately milepost 499."
Attorney: "And where is milepost 499?"
Witness: "About halfway between milepost 498 and milepost 500."
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Q: What's the difference between a policeman's knightstick and a magician's wand?
A: A Magician's wand is for cunning stunts.
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A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.--Milton Berle
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The Vampire Combat Manual: A Guide to Fighting the Bloodthirsty Undead is “your indispensable key to survival” against a vampire attack. The book, authored by Roger Ma (who also authored The Zombie Combat Manual), is available to purchase on Amazon. An online community has been set up at The Vampire Combat Club website and t-shirts are available at their Zazzle site.
WHEN DARKNESS FALLS… WHEN THE UNDEAD RISE WITH A HUNGER FOR BLOOD… WHEN THE HUNT IS ON—AND YOU ARE THE PREY… WILL YOU BE READY?
In the inevitable event of a vampire attack, the average citizen will be forced to engage in vicious hand-to-hand combat. To avoid serious injury, disfigurement, or death by exsanguination, you need to know the proper combat strategies and techniques to ward off a stronger, faster, more agile undead opponent looking to drain the life from your body. Are you prepared? With detailed illustrations and firsthand accounts from vampire combat veterans—as well as interviews with actual members of the undead—this manual provides you with the information you need to survive with your life and blood supply intact, including:
• Debunking myths, i.e.: vampire flight, animal metamorphosis, physical attraction to humans
• Crafting the most lethal vampire weapons from everyday materials
• The pros—and cons—of decapitation
• Weaponizing Ultraviolet (UV) light against an undead opponent
• Using the Domicile Histodiscordant Reaction (DHR), otherwise known as “The Vampire Invitation,” to your advantage
• Solo attacks, team-based combat, and much more…
The Vampire Combat Manual is your indispensable key to survival, whether in a one-on-one battle for blood or a face-off against multiple attackers. Don’t wait until the sun goes down—prepare yourself now!
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Click to enlarge
Cockroach giving birth
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On October 2, 1992, Cartoon Network was born.
Twenty years later, it still acts like a child.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CARTOON NETWORK!
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You can go ahead and thank Carl Zimmer in advance for the hours of sleep you’re about to lose.
As part of his role as the internet’s cataloguer for all that is tiny, invisible and mildly terrifying, he stumbled upon a study that counted the number of viruses and bacteria in a cubic meter of air. Ready for this?
  • It contains between 860,000 and 11 million bacteria.
  • It contains between 1.6 million and 40 million viruses.
  • In each minute of breathing, you intake several hundred thousand viruses, and who knows how many bacteria.
Of course, without viruses, and the genes they have donated to us, mammals couldn’t be born. And the number we breathe is nothing compared to how many are in the ocean (light years’ worth!!). I guess there’s a silver lining … most of them can’t infect humans? If you need me, I’ll be in my Contagion bubble.
So, uh … how long can you hold your breath?
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Why Third Grade Is So Important: The ‘Matthew Effect’
Children who have made the leap to fluent reading will learn exponentially, while those who haven't will slump
What makes success in third grade so significant? It’s the year that students move from learning to read — decoding words using their knowledge of the alphabet — to reading to learn.
Read more: http://ideas.time.com/2012/09/26/why-third-grade-is-so-important-the-matthew-effect/#ixzz28Cdl5AVW
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When the airline Captain announced they were flying over Salt Lake City, Utah, a woman told the man sitting beside her, "I understand this is the home of the Mormon religion where husbands believe it's OK to have more than one wife."
"That's true," he replied, "as a matter of fact I happen to be a Mormon myself and have nine wives."
"How disgusting,"she said,"you should be ashamed of yourself, such practices should be against the law and you ought to be hung."
With a slight grin, he just said,"Yes, ma'am I am."
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85. LAWRENCE OF ARABIA: All men dream
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Flying robot quadrocopters cooperate to play catch
Swiss researchers have published a new video showcasing the impressive aerial cooperation capabilities of robotic quadrocopters. In the demonstration, a trio of quadrocopters tethered to a net fly in formation to catch balls tossed at them. Once they’ve caught the ball in the net, they are able to launch it upwards by stretching the net at each end.
“To toss the ball, the quadrocopters accelerate rapidly outward to stretch the net tight between them and launch the ball up. Notice in the video that the quadrocopters are then pulled forcefully inward by the tension in the elastic net, and must rapidly stabilize in order to avoid a collision. Once recovered, the quadrotors cooperatively position the net below the ball in order to catch it.” explained Robin Ritz, Lead Researcher at ETH Zurich’s Flying Machine Arena.
“Because they are coupled to each other by the net, the quadrocopters experience complex forces that push the vehicles to the limits of their dynamic capabilities. To exploit the full potential of the vehicles under these circumstances requires several novel algorithms…
Thanks, Ed
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Insects with visible human skeletons do insect things in the unsettling animation Hominid, based on the series of photo composites by Brian Andrews under the same title. Link-via Daily of the Day
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Have you ever wondered what the a bowling alley looks like in those areas not open to the public? Redditor Kiowa707 is a student mechanic who works at a bowling alley, keeping the pinsetters functioning. He posted a series of pictures to show us what is back there behind the scenes. Link
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5 Terrifying Animals That Could Save Your Life Someday
Sharks, vampire bats, crocodiles: the stuff of horror movies. Yes, these animals can kill you, but medical science is turning lemons into lemonade, so to speak. For example, the venom of a cobra:
Well, scientists think that part of what makes venom so nasty is that it suppresses the body's ability to fight back by hampering the immune system's normal healing process. So if you had a disease caused by an overactive immune system, a chemical that slows it down would be the proverbial vigilante crime fighter keeping a corrupt police department in check. This may be why in India cobra venom is considered an arthritis cure -- arthritis is caused by the body's own immune system keeping the sufferer's joints chronically inflamed. So then you start looking at other even more horrible diseases, like multiple sclerosis and HIV -- both of which involve royal cock-ups in the immune system. Read about five such terrors from nature at Cracked. Link -via Gorilla Mask
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Cum in my hair
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From the 1977 all-Soviet-Union Mathematical Olympiad:
Seven dwarfs are sitting at a round table. Each has a cup, and some cups contain milk. Each dwarf in turn pours all his milk into the other six cups, dividing it equally among them. After the seventh dwarf has done this, they find that each cup again contains its initial quantity of milk. How much milk does each cup contain, if there were 42 ounces of milk altogether?
Since the final state matches the initial state, we can imagine this process going on continuously. Consider the dwarf whose cup contains the smallest amount of milk just before he begins pouring. Call him D, and call this quantity of milk a ounces. Since D’s cup contains the least milk before pouring, then each other dwarf has an equal or greater amount in his own cup before pouring, and thus gives D at least a/6 ounces. This would leave D with at least a ounces in his own cup just before pouring; the only way he can receive precisely a ounces, as we know he does, is if each other dwarf gives him precisely a/6 ounces and no more, i.e., that each cup, just before pouring, contains the same quantity of milk. So after any given pouring the cups contain a, 5/6a, 4/6a, 3/6a, 2/6a, 1/6a, and 0 ounces; if there are 42 ounces in total then this works out to 12, 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, and 0 ounces.
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“It seems to me immensely unlikely that mind is a mere by-product of matter. For if my mental processes are determined wholly by the motions of atoms in my brain I have no reason to suppose that my beliefs are true. They may be sound chemically, but that does not make them sound logically. And hence I have no reason for supposing my brain to be composed of atoms.” — J.B.S. Haldane, Possible Worlds, 1927
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santa claus bank note
The U.S. government did not issue paper money until 1861. Until then, private banks printed their own currency under charters to the states.
As a result, this $5 bill featuring Santa Claus was legal tender in the 1850s. It was issued by the Howard Banking Company of Boston.
A number of banks issued Santa-themed money in the same period — the most natural being the St. Nicholas Bank of New York City.
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A fen is one of the four main types of wetland, and is usually fed by mineral-rich surface water or groundwater. Fens are characterised by their water chemistry, which is neutral or alkaline, with relatively high dissolved mineral levels but few other plant nutrients. They are usually dominated by grasses and sedges, and typically have brown mosses in general including Scorpidium or Drepanocladus. Fens are distinguished from bogs, which are acidic, low in minerals, and usually dominated by sedges and shrubs, along with abundant mosses in the genus Sphagnum.
Main wetland types include swamps, marshes, bogs and fens. Sub-types include mangrove, carr, pocosin, and varzea.
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Freckles

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peccable
adj. liable to sin
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The first real debate of this presidential election year is coming up tomorrow. But the debates held over the years on SNL are a lot more fun! Can you recall who played the candidates in those comedy debates? Test yourself with today's Lunchtime Quiz at mental_floss. I scored 50%, because I knew the really old ones, but not the more recent casts. Link
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They fell, alright, like dominoes! Oh yeah, these dinosaurs ARE dominoes, stacked with care by Flippycat. Two weeks to stack, mere seconds to see them come tumbling down. -via The Daily What
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The Adventures of the Real Tom Sawyer
Mark Twain prowled the rough-and-tumble streets of 1860s San Francisco with a hard-drinking, larger-than-life fireman
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Let’s hope this isn’t true — Francis Joseph Baigent’s History of the Ancient Town and Manor of Basingstoke (1889) records the story of a woman who was buried alive twice. Baigent cites two sources, an undated tract from around 1675 and a book published in 1786, The Uncertainty of the Signs of Death. Mrs. Blunden, the wife of a local malt trader, was “a fat gross woman” who in July 1674 drank so much poppy-water (opium) that she fell into a deep sleep that arrested any apparent breath or pulse. The apothecary declared that he supposed she would never wake, and her husband left for London on business, directing that she be buried on his return. But the woman’s relatives noted that the weather was warm and that the body would not last four days, so they buried her on the following day, a Wednesday. Now the tract reads:
The Friday following toward the evening some of the Scholars of the Town being at play in the Churchyard near her grave, they fancied they heard a kind of hollow voice, as it were under ground, to which laying their ears and listening more attentively they plainly heard somebody say:
Take me out of my Grave,
which words the complaining voice repeated several times, intermixing them with fearful groans and dismal shriekings.
The boys reported this to several people but were dismissed. They returned to the chuchyard on Saturday and heard the voice again, “if not with so distinct yet with a louder accent,” and that afternoon the clerk finally exhumed Mrs. Blunden. “And now surveying her body, they found it most lamentably beaten, which they concluded to proceed from the violence she did herself in that deplorable an astonishment, but upon the most diligent scrutiny they could not apprehend that she had the least breath of life remaining, and therefore they again let her down into the grave, intending on the morrow to send to the Coroner.”
Guards were set to watch the resealed grave, but as the night was wet they abandoned their post, and “on the morrow morning at their return to the grave, they found she had torn off great part of her winding sheet, scratched herself first in several places, and beaten her mouth so long till it was all in gore blood.”
A number of citizens were indicted for their negligence, but a town doctor testified that he had held a mirror to Blunden’s mouth before her burial and could see no sign of breath, so “only the Town had a considerable fine set upon them for their neglect.”
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https://vimeo.com/16817552
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Chinese poet and palindromist Su Hui lost her husband to a concubine in the fourth century. To console her grief and to lure him back, she composed an ingenious array of 841 characters that can be read forward, backward, horizontally, vertically, and diagonally:
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Xuanjitu.GIF
Each seven-character segment corresponds to a poetic line, and can be read in either direction. At the end of each segment, “you encounter a junction of meridians and can choose which direction to go,” explains anthologist David Hinton. “You can begin anywhere, and the poem ends after four lines have been chosen. This structure generates 2,848 possible poems.”
It’s said that Su Hui’s husband was so moved that he sent away the concubine and rejoined her.
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I'm conflicted. It's wrong. But it feels so right!
Raks Geek, the dancing troupe that features a TARDIS dance, presents "Let the Wookiee Dance." Musical accompaniment includes "Muaarga," a Klingon song performed by Il Troubadore Klingon Music Project.
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The Weather Channel will Name Winter Storms
y
Why should hurricanes get all the love? The Weather Channel has decided that notable winter storms will be named, and they've already posted a list of those names. This will at least make t-shirt vendors happy, as they will be able to come up with unique designs for "I survived Draco 2012" or "Minnesota Gandolf Survivor." Link
(Isn't Gandalf spelled with an 'a'?)
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"A new report found that 20 percent of people over 45 had to dip into their retirement savings last year. And the other 80 percent said, 'retirement savings?'" -Jimmy Fallon
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Oreo made big news last month when they released their candy corn flavor, but that's not even that crazy compared to some of their other flavors -half grape and half peach anyone? Have you guys ever had any of these odd Oreo flavors Link
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"There seems to still be sexism in politics. You still see candidates objectified. I'm talking about you, Paul Ryan: with your great abs and suspiciously good marathon times." -Craig Ferguson
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Believe it or not, powdered ancient dead guys were prescribed to cure what ails you. With all the moisture gone and other things mixed in, doctors could tell themselves this wasn't exactly cannibalism.
Physicians pre-scribed powdered mummy for diverse ailments. An English pharmacopeia published in 1721 specifies two ounces of mummy as the proper amount to make a “plaster against ruptures.” Ambroise Paré, royal surgeon to sixteenth century French kings, proclaimed mummy to be “the very first and last medicine of almost all our practitioners” against bruising.
Read more about this gruesome (to our sensibilities) practice at the Neatorama Halloween blog. Link
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Q and A Quickies

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs that can swim across a pool?
A: Clever Dick!

Q: Who is the poorest guy in West Virginia?
A: The Tooth Fairy!
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"I was talking to my friend at the weather department and he said that in autumn you have weather that's not really cold and certainly not really hot, so pollsters refer to autumn as 'undecided.'" -David Letterman
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615627_490810387598820_2134151421_o
Meet Peggy, Anzac, and Cupcake. Not only are all three Marsupials, but they were all orphaned when motor vehicle accidents claimed the lives of their mothers. It's difficult to know their exact ages, but Australia's Wild About Wildlife Rescue Center estimates that Peggy the Wombat and Anzac the Eastern Grey Kangaroo were 3 - 4 months old when they came into care. Cupcake the Swamp Wallaby was about 5 months of age.
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Original Recipe for Jack Daniel's Whiskey Found in Old Welsh Book of Home Remedies
The origins of the divine whiskey from Lynchburg, Tennessee are a mystery. But a Briton named Mark Evans thinks that he may have found the original recipe for it in an old book passed down in his family:
It was written in 1853 by his great-great grandmother who was called Daniels and was a local herbalist in Llanelli, South Wales. Her brother-in-law left the Welsh town at about the same time to move to Lynchburg Tennessee where the Jack Daniel's distillery was opened three years later. And the Jack Daniel's website states the founder of the distillery was from Wales. [...]
The history of Jack Daniel's is a mystery because the distillery's early records were destroyed in a courthouse fire A spokesman for the company said: "We know our founder was from Wales - we would love to see the book and the recipe. Link -via Glenn Reynolds | Photo: Rodrigo Galindez
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The young couple was engaged in a most affectionate embrace when there came the sound of a key in the front door. The young lady broke away at once, eyes wide with alarm.
"Heavens," she cried, "it's my husband! Quick, jump out the window."
The young man, equally alarmed, made a quick step toward the window, then demurred. "I can't," he said, "we're on the thirteenth floor."
"For heaven's sake," cried the young lady in exasperation, "is this a time to be superstitious?"
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Norwegians Fridtjof StensÆth Josefsen and Jakob SchØyen Andersen brag about how their alphabet is bigger than the one we use in the U.S. The song is catchy, but a few lyrics are NSFW. -via Metafilter
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Oh sure, you've heard the joke quite a few times after the game Battleship was made into a feature film. The trailer here is a joke, from Film School Rejects. But the Hungry Hungry Hippos movie is really supposed to happen.
Hasbro, the company behind the hits "Transformers" and "G.I. Joe" and the flop "Battleship," has signed a deal with independent production and finance company Emmett/Furla Films to make movies based on the board games Hungry Hungry Hippos and Monopoly and the toy Action Man.

Rhode Island-headquartered Hasbro, which has a film production office at the Universal Pictures lot, announced the three-picture deal Thursday and confirmed that the first movie will be "Monopoly," which the two companies hope to start production on in 2013.
Monopoly, under producer Ridley Scott, was already in development at Universal and will continue with Emmett/Furla Films as co-producer. Link -via Buzzfeed
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My Pet Ghost by Hallmark
Genevieve Ruffles, Julian Hijinks, and Maxwell McSpooky are the character names from Hallmark’s My Pet Ghost, a Halloween product line that features “frightening ghosts” that have been captured in a bottle. To make the pet ghosts appear and to hear one of three spooky sounds, you press the top of the bottle’s stopper. Hallmark says that they “have been happily haunting since 1602 and are ready to make an appearance in your home.” On a recent trip to Santa Cruz, California, I spotted a display of them at CVS (images). You can check out one of the ghosts appearing in the bottle and speaking in this video uploaded by Shari G.
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Mark Twain once entered a contest that offered $10 for the best original poem on the topic of spring, “no poem to be considered unless it should possess positive value.” He submitted this:
http://books.google.com/books?id=QoSwAAAAIAAJ
“It took the prize for this reason, no other poem offered was really worth more than $4.50, whereas there was no getting around the petrified fact that this one was worth $10. In truth there was not a banker in the whole town who was willing to invest a cent in those other poems, but every one of them said this one was good, sound, seaworthy poetry, and worth its face. … Let other struggling young poets be encouraged by this to go striving.”
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Spooky Witches Fingers
Spooky Witches Fingers Recipe
Original recipe makes 60 cookies
Directions
  1. Combine the butter, sugar, egg, almond extract, and vanilla extract in a mixing bowl. Beat together with an electric mixer; gradually add the flour, baking powder, and salt, continually beating; refrigerate 20 to 30 minutes.
  2. Preheat oven to 325 degrees F (165 degrees C). Lightly grease baking sheets.
  3. Remove dough from refrigerator in small amounts. Scoop 1 heaping teaspoon at a time onto a piece of waxed paper. Use the waxed paper to roll the dough into a thin finger-shaped cookie. Press one almond into one end of each cookie to give the appearance of a long fingernail. Squeeze cookie near the tip and again near the center of each to give the impression of knuckles. You can also cut into the dough with a sharp knife at the same points to help give a more finger-like appearance. Arrange the shaped cookies on the baking sheets.
  4. Bake in the preheated oven until the cookies are slightly golden in color, 20 to 25 minutes.
  5. Remove the almond from the end of each cookie; squeeze a small amount of red decorating gel into the cavity; replace the almond to cause the gel to ooze out around the tip of the cookie.
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Wisconsin may seem an unlikely place for a Victorian inventor from England to take up home, but that is exactly what Dr Evermor did. You can still see a myriad of his inventions on display in the small town of Sumpter.
By far the largest of his creations, the Forevertron, takes pride of place at the center of this amazing collection. Dr Evermor used his colossal contrivance and disappeared before the turn of the new, twentieth century.
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These modern irritations sound completely ridiculous in a different context. This video was produced by The Gift of Water as part of their series about first world problems. The videos bring attention to Water Is Life, an organization dedicated to bringing a safe water supply to everyone. Link
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Quantum physics is a branch of physics dealing with physical phenomena at microscopic scales. The theory provides a mathematical description of much of the dual particle-like and wave-like behavior and interactions of energy and matter.

Quantum physics is getting real - and getting really weird. If the strange properties of entanglement, teleportation and superposition can be harnessed, it could revolutionize computing, communication, banking and much, much more. That's a big 'if.' But several reports over the past few days suggest that folks are willing to spend millions of dollars to turn theory into reality.
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Why does the moon seem to change its shape every night? The answer is the moon is a world in space, just as Earth is. Like Earth, it's always half illuminated by the sun. In other words, the round globe of the moon has a day side and a night side. From our earthly vantage point, as the moon orbits around Earth, we see varying fractions of its day and night sides. Understand the various phases of the moon.
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Chef Jon of Food Wishes tells us the secret of looking like a competent chef, even if you aren't. Don't let my kids see this video, they'll be flipping food all over the kitchen practicing this! Link -via Viral Viral Videos
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"Money often costs too much.” — Emerson
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You can see me
Guy Debord’s 1957 autobiography, Mémoires, was bound in a sandpaper cover so that it would destroy any book placed next to it.
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Higgs boson data from CERN turned into a melody? Yes, please! Best thing since the Solar System set to music and this three-movement choral suite inspired by Sagan.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Mind-Boggling Microscopic Photos - [wow photography]
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Overdramatic Facebook Ad: The Things That Connect Us [Video]
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Ever wanted to know what the Freemasons do or what all their weird symbols mean? Why Odd Fellows keep real human skeletons? Or why people freak out about the supposed Illuminati? Their members use secret handshakes and coded language. In temples, they don ancient regalia, helmets, or masks. Thanks to their veils of secrecy and archaic symbols like the All-Seeing Eye, outsiders find fraternal orders endlessly fascinating. But what does it all mean?
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Performing simple tasks in a complex manner is what the human-powered freerunning machine is all about, BUT we decided to take a new spin on the classic machine. Check out the video and let us know what you think!
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This is Salar de Uyuni, a salt flat measuring 10,582 sq km located in Bolivia’s southwestern regions of Oruno and Potosi. Around 400,000 years ago this location was part of the great Lake Minchin, which has since dried out leaving behind two lakes, Poopo and Uru Uru, and two salt flats, this being the largest.

When it rains, the flat surface becomes covered with a shallow pool of water, this act
s as a gigantic mirror reflecting the sky, and everything else effortlessly!

Cool eh? But wait, there's more! The area is so reflective it is utilised as a calibration tool for satellites, or more specifically; remote sensing instruments. It is considered to be 5 times better for calibration than the surface of the oceans. Impressive!

For more photos and information on the salt flats see here:
http://www.kuriositas.com/2011/08/salar-de-uyuni-spectacular-sea-of-salt.html

Photo courtesy of: Diego Salgado Mohor
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One time me and two of my friends went over to another friends house expecting him to be home but nobody was. We had also remembered that his parents were out of town for the week, so we decided to go inside and wait for him.
I slipped in through the oversize dog door. Once we were inside we got a little bit bored so we decided to leave , but before we did I came across a great idea. You see his mom collects teddy bears and had hundreds of them placed all around the house. So we gathered allmost all of them and placed them in the living room and sat them
on couches, chairs and the floor all facing the TV.Just then I found a videotape of Barny (EVERYONES FAVORITE PURPLE FRIEND). We put in the tape and left the remote control in the biggestbears lap with the volume all the way up and then left.
Later that night we called him and told him that we were coming over, he sounded worried. When we arrived he answered the door with a shotgun in his hand, he was scared shitless. Turns out that he and his girlfriend called the cops and had to explain the whole story, The found nothing, laughed and left.
To this day he dosent understand what happened and sometimes we joke around with him about it. Since only 3 of us know about it there is always new people that think he is crazy.
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You've been preparing for this
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Hey St. Jude
Celebrities join kids with cancer to sing Hey Jude in support of St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital.
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"We are an impossibility in an impossible universe." - Ray Bradbury
A life without tragedy would not be worth living. - Edward Abbey
"My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed." - Christopher Morley
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When Germany was blockaded by the British in 1916, naval officer Felix von Luckner hit on a dashing solution: He outfitted a three-masted sailing ship, the Seeadler, with hidden guns and engines and crept through the cordon posing as a humble Norwegian wood carrier. Once safely at sea he spent the ensuing year as a sort of humanitarian pirate, sinking one merchant ship after another while imprisoning their crews and leading the British and American navies on a merry chase. Over 225 days he captured some 16 ships and 300 prisoners with nearly no loss of life (one British sailor was killed by a ruptured steam pipe). The Seeadler was finally wrecked on a reef in August 1917, and Von Luckner spent the rest of the war in a New Zealand prisoner-of-war camp.
In the interval he returned a measure of romance to naval warfare, giving his “guests” run of the ship and even permitting captured cooks to prepare meals in their native cuisines. “When he discovered, after sinking the [Canadian schooner] Percy, that he had interrupted a honeymoon, he was most contrite and gave the Kohlers a cabin to themselves, remarking that he was desolated at having had to sink their ship,” writes John Philips Cranwell in Spoilers of the Sea. “Captain Kohler’s remarks on the subject are not, unfortunately, available.”
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This amazing machine can create clothing, shoes, vegetables, pain cans, tampons lumber and even a couch. It’s amazing!
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Black Testicles

A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still heavily sedated from a difficult four hour surgical procedure.
A young student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.. ‘Nurse,’ he mumbles, from behind the mask’, Are my testicles black?’
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies ‘I don’t know, Sir. I’m only here to wash your upper body.’
He struggles to ask again, ‘Nurse, are my testicles black?’
Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and sheepishly pulls back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them around and around gently. Then, she takes a close look and says, ‘No sir, they aren’t and I assure you, there’s nothing wrong with them, Sir !!’
The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly, ‘Thank you very much. That was
wonderful, but listen very, very closely…..

’A r e – m y – t e s t – r e s u l t s -b a c k ?’
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Photographer Oliver Klink took this photo of two grizzly bear cubs holding hands (everybody say "awww" together now) for the National Geographic 2008 International Photo Contest: Link
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bear Left
Two Polish hunters were driving through the country to go bear hunting.
They came upon a fork in the road where a sign read, "BEAR LEFT".
So they went home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy has been drinking in a bar all day and asks the bartender where the toilet is. So the guy goes to the toilet and he's there pissing away when he looks to his left and sees a big guy come in.
The guy pulls out his dick and it's huge. The guy goes over to a urinal, swings his dick like a bat and smashes the urinal in two. He then goes over to the sink, swings it and smashes the sink in two. He then goes over to the toilet doors and smashes it in half.
He says to the first man, "I'm gonna stick this up your ass!"
The guy goes, "Phew! For a minute I thought you were going to hit me with it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My birthday present from a friend ~
Ursa ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ursarodinia@aol.com

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