Friday, February 22, 2013

Paws & Claws January 13, 2013 ~ ~ Playoffs & Old Friends

With every passing hour
our solar system comes forty-three thousand miles
closer to globular cluster 13
in the constellation Hercules,
and still there are some misfits
who continue to insist
that there is no such thing as progress.

~ Ransom K. Ferm ~
fictional character from Kurt Vonnegut Jr's novel "The Sirens of Titan."

2013 January 12
See Explanation.  Clicking on the picture will download 
the highest resolution version available.
Ten Billion Earths
Illustration Credit: NASA / Ames / JPL-Caltech
Explanation: How common are Earth-sized planets? Quite common, according to extrapolations from new data taken by NASA's orbiting Kepler spacecraft. Current computer models are indicating that at least one in ten stars are orbited by an Earth-sized planet, making our Milky Way Galaxy the home to over ten billion Earths. Unfortunately, this estimate applies only to planets effectively inside the orbit of Mercury, making these hot-Earths poor vacation opportunities for humans. This histogram depicts the estimated fraction of stars that have close orbiting planets of various sizes. The number of Sun-like stars with Earth-like planets in Earth-like orbits is surely much less, but even so, Kepler has also just announced the discovery of four more of those.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`2013 January 7
See Explanation.  Clicking on the picture will download 
the highest resolution version available.
AE Aurigae and the Flaming Star Nebula
Image Credit & Copyright: Martin Pugh
Explanation: AE Aurigae is called the flaming star. The surrounding nebula IC 405 is named the Flaming Star Nebula and the region seems to harbor smoke, but there is no fire. Fire, typically defined as the rapid molecular acquisition of oxygen, happens only when sufficient oxygen is present and is not important in such high-energy, low-oxygen environments. The material that appears as smoke is mostly interstellar hydrogen, but does contain smoke-like dark filaments of carbon-rich dust grains. The bright star AE Aurigae, visible near the nebula center, is so hot it is blue, emitting light so energetic it knocks electrons away from atoms in the surrounding gas. When an atom recaptures an electron, light is emitted creating the surrounding emission nebula. In this cosmic portrait, the Flaming Star nebula lies about 1,500 light years distant, spans about 5 light years, and is visible with a small telescope toward the constellation of the Charioteer (Auriga).
Philip K. Dick is gone, but Get 11 Free Stories. And HERE is the Philip K. Dick documentary.
"A machine is a great moral educator. If a horse or a donkey won't go, men lose their tempers and beat it; if a machine won't go, there is no use beating it. You have to think and try till you find what is wrong. That is real education." -- Gilbert Murray
Let's look at what we have learned from this election:
Twenty-one of 22 incumbent senators were re-elected, and 353 of 373 incumbent members of the House were re-elected. The American people have re-elected 94 percent of the incumbents who were running for re-election to an institution that has an approval rating of about 9%. This indicates, as an electorate, we are a nation of idiots. We are now stuck with the useless, dysfunctional government that we deserve.
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom?
One snatches watches and the other watches snatches!
Tricks of the Trade
"President Obama signed the new fiscal cliff tax increase into law while vacationing in Hawaii today. He used an autopen, an electronic way of signing your name when you're not even there. Politicians can now raise your taxes while they're on vacation in Hawaii. This is a Democrat's dream come true." -Jay Leno

The wife left a note on the fridge, "It's not working! I can't take it any more, I've gone to stay at my mother's!"
I opened the fridge, the light came on and the beer was cold...God only knows what she was talking about.

"A new study shows that monkeys can look at photos and recognize other monkeys they know. However, the study also shows that monkeys are terrible with names." -Conan O'Brien

"A new study found that bacon and freshly baked bread are Americans' favorite smells. Yeah, this morning instead of putting on cologne, I just rubbed my neck with a B.L.T." -Jimmy Fallon

"A woman in California is being studied because she says she remembers everything from the last 12 years. And I'm thinking, 'Wait a minute isn't that every woman?'" -Dave Letterman
How to make Salt dough offering bowls
1 cup salt
2 cups all purpose flour
1 cup luke warm water
1. In a large bowl mix salt and flour.
2. Gradually stir in water. Mix well until it forms a doughy consistency.
3. With your hands form a ball with your dough and kneed it for at least 5 minutes. The longer you kneed your dough the smoother it will be.
Store your salt dough in a air tight container and you will be able to use it for days.
An old man and his son had a one-horse farm where they barely made a living. Then, one day, the son hit the lottery and won $50,000.
The young man rushed into town, collected his money, then hurried back home. He ran across the field, told his father the news, and handed the older man a $50 bill.
The father looked at the money for a moment and then said, "Son, you know I've always been careful with what little money we had. I didn't spend it on whiskey or women. In fact, I couldn't even afford the license to
legally marry your Ma."
"Pa!" the young man stammered, "do you know what that makes me?"
"Yep," said the old man fingering the $50, "... and a cheap one, too.

QUOTE: "Real joy comes not from ease or riches or from the praise of men, but from doing something worthwhile."

HINT: (1865-1940), medical missionary to Newfoundland and Labrador.

ANSWER: Sir Wilfred Grenfell
Great video on how to save someone using an AED. Definitely worth two minutes.
We have all walked by the Red Cross sign in airports indicating where a heart machine is located. Do you know what is in them and how to use it? Try this video and see what you think.
If you pick the wrong choice----the man dies----choosing wisely may save a life. I Just watched this video and was impressed, so I'm sending it to those on my mailing list with the hope that it'll save lives (maybe mine, yours or someone you love!).

Gardening with a whimsy flair - create an eco-fairy village for the wee folk to stay while they tend your garden chores. The eco-village must not have anything purchased, the wee folk must learn to make do on recycled and re-purposed loot, trinkets, and handmade huts, 'n hovels. Make it an adventure to locate the pieces of your eco-fairy village.

We bought the wrong horse! Hilarious insurance commercial...

A 4000 Mile Human Powered Journey
Written by Caroline Van Hemert. Photography by Patrick Farrell
Thanks Maniac-Mikey
I was talking with an older friend of mine who has been struggling to come to terms with middle age.

"I'm really worried about myself," he said forlornly. "My memory has always been a source of quiet pride to me, but lately it's been failing me. I'm having a hard time remembering things from the mundane to the major."

"I wouldn't worry too much," I said consolingly, "sounds like you'll forget all about it tomorrow."

"A new book about why women have sex claims that women's reasons differ from pleasure to obligation to even 'feeling sorry for the guy.' After hearing this, men everywhere said, 'Whatever...'" -Conan O'Brien

I went to the doctor's the other day and found out my new doctor is a young female, and drop-dead gorgeous!

I was embarrassed but she said, "Don't worry, I'm a professional - I've seen it all before. Just tell me what's wrong and I'll help you in any way I can."

"Well," I said, "I think my dick tastes funny..."

"A new Nielson survey found that Washington, D.C. has the most 25-34-year-olds in the country who make over $100,000 a year. They're called hookers." -Jimmy Fallon

"According to a new poll, Congress is now less popular than head lice, Nickelback, and Donald Trump. In a related story, head lice is insulted that it's being lumped in with Donald Trump and Nickelback." -Conan O'Brien

"Today, members of the 113th Congress were sworn in at the Capitol. After which, they were like, 'Well, that's enough work for the year.'" -Jimmy Fallon
Thanks Dana

As I Mature

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes, After that you better have a huge schlong.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.
I've learned that you can keep vomiting, long after you think you're finished.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place!

I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon,
and all the less important ones just never go away.

"Alabama won the college football championship game. It was a tough loss for the Notre Dame Fighting Irish. If only Irish people had some kind of tradition of drowning their sorrows in something, it would have been much easier." -Jimmy Kimmel

Before my daughter went on her first date, I gave her "the talk."

"Sometimes, it's easy to get carried away when you are with a boy," I said. "Remember, a short moment of indiscretion could ruin your life."

"Don't worry," she said. "I don't plan on ruining my life until I get married."

The biggest snake in the world found dead!

You find this herd hanging out in the Columbia Gorge by Interstate 84 in Oregon. There's usually about 50 of them spread over about a mile.
Thanks Maniac-Mikey


A couple of the girls in the office were talking about that old show Fear Factor.

Amber said, "I would never survive on that show because I am so afraid of spiders. If ANY of the challenges had to do with spiders I would just freak out and quit."

Kerbi answered, "What I would do is tell them I was deathly afraid of snakes, which I'm not really, then when they created a challenge for me involving snakes I wouldn't have any problem with it."

At that I had to contribute, "I would tell them I was deathly afraid of puppies, like bichon puppies. Oh, and beer. I would tell them I am completely nauseated by beer. Now that would be a fun challenge to tackle."


"Almost half of the world's food is not consumed"
As much as half of all the food produced in the world – equivalent to 2bn tonnes – ends up as waste every year, engineers warned in a report published on Thursday. The UK's Institution of Mechanical Engineers (IME) blames the "staggering" new figures in its analysis on unnecessarily strict sell-by dates, buy-one-get-one free and Western consumer demand for cosmetically perfect food, along with "poor engineering and agricultural practices", inadequate infrastructure and poor storage facilities...

In the UK as much as 30% of vegetable crops are not harvested due to their failure to meet retailers' exacting standards on physical appearance, it says, while up to half of the food that is bought in Europe and the US is thrown away by consumers.



Smurfs Arrested for Assault
Last week it was Oomps-Loompas; this week Smurfs. Four men painted blue and dressed as Smurfs entered a store in Pascoe Vale, a suburb of Melbourne, Australia.
A 37-year-old Pascoe Vale man was buying cigarettes at a convenience store when he was approached by a man painted blue and dressed as a character from the 1980s cartoon show, police say.

The Smurf asked for a cigarette and was offered one, but he demanded the man light the cigarette before handing it over.

The man refused and was later assaulted.
Police appealed to the public and asked the four men to come forward. Three unidentified 19-year-men and one 18-year-old turned themselves in, and will be charged with "assault-related offences." Link-via Arbroath

(Image credit: Victoria Police)

Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.
--Friedrich Nietzsche

No price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.
--Friedrich Nietzsche

To predict the behavior of ordinary people in advance, you only have to assume that they will always try to escape a disagreeable situation with the smallest possible expenditure of intelligence.
--Friedrich Nietzsche

Digressions, objections, delight in mockery, carefree mistrust are signs of health; everything unconditional belongs in pathology.
--Friedrich Nietzsche

You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star.
--Friedrich Nietzsche

My sister and I were out on the town one night when we ran into a man I knew. "You're sisters?" he asked incredulously. "You look nothing alike.

Pointing to her nose and my chin, my sister said, "Different plastic surgeons."

Everybody needs a little help around the house every now and then. It's hard to remember exactly how to get candle wax out of the carpet and who ever dreamed of the one hundred and one household chores you can accomplish with just a little baking soda and vinegar?! From accessories and autos to zinc and zippers, Holly and her readers give you quick and easy steps to tackle all the little chores around the house. You'll wonder how you ever lived without it!
Quick and practical tips five days a week. Just click the link below and look for...
Look for Handy Hints Here


While Kentucky Fried Chicken has long promoted its use of 11 herbs and spices in its Original Recipe, those who have attempted to "crack" the secret claim that its merely a combination of five ingredients: flour, salt, sugar, black pepper, and MSG.

Saffron is a slightly bitter, honey-like spice that comes from the crocus plant. It takes approximately 75,000 flowers and about 200 hours of work to produce 1 pound of dried saffron, which it why it's so expensive at $65 per ounce.

The very first product in the Old Spice cologne and aftershave line was Early American Old Spice in 1937, and it was made especially for women.

Despite its name, allspice is not a blend of ingredients; it comes from the berries of the Pimenta dioica or Jamaican pepper plant.

The mace you see in the spice aisle at the supermarket has nothing to do with the stuff you spray in the face of an attacker. Mace the spice comes from the same seed that gives us nutmeg, and the two are very similar in flavor.

Countries with hotter climates usually has recipes that call for a lot of spicy ingredients, particularly garlic, onion, allspice and oregano. These ingredients have significant antibacterial properties, and in the days before refrigeration, they not only flavored meat, but they also prevented it from spoiling.

QUOTE: "We have all a better guide in ourselves, if we would attend to it, than any other person can be."

HINT: (1775-1817), English novelist whose works of romantic fiction, set among the landed gentry, earned her a place as one of the most widely read writers in English literature.

ANSWER: Jane Austen.

Creativity requires the courage to let go of certainties. ~ Erich Fromm

Photo: Beertone
Whether you are brewing it or drinking it, I think we can all agree that beer is awesome. To help you navigate that awesome Beertone had created this color matching guide so you can better identify the beers you love so very much.
A lot of ideas stay on paper or locked in some sideboard in the office. Not this time. With Beertone we are trying to bring to life a simple idea, a Beer Reference Guide (like the picture above) based on beer's color.
The bright beers will start the guide ending with the dark ones. Each Beer will be presented with picture, description and of course its color Information, RGB, CMYK, Web, SRM (that's the beer color scale). We are shooting each beer, bottle and the beer itself in a glass.
The reference guides are available for pre-order and with a few different options. Link
Knitting Behind the Wheel

A highway patrolman pulled up alongside a speeding car on the freeway.
As the officer peered through the driver's window, he was astounded to find that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting.
The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "Pull over!" at the top of his lungs.
"No!" the blonde yelled back, "Scarf!"

As weddings go I don't suppose this is very bizarre. I have read about couples exchanging their vows while SCUBA diving, while skydiving, even while (or immediately before) bungee-jumping. Compared to these getting married aboard a hot air balloon is practically mundane. It is what happened during the ceremony that makes the event note-worthy.

Things got off to a bumpy start when a gust of wind forced the pilot to make a crash landing in the yard of a San Diego home.

A San Diego Fire-Rescue Department spokesman says one of the 14 people on-board suffered a minor back injury.

The marrying couple said the gust caught the balloon just after they exchanged their vows, causing it to sway over the Rancho Penasquitos neighborhood.

The landing on a hillside fence behind the house was filmed by a member of the wedding party. Video showed the blue-and-yellow balloon draped over trees near the house afterward.

Not to be deterred from having a good time the couple continued to their reception.

Q and A Quickies

Q: I have 3 heads, 5 legs, 7 arms and 444 fingers. What am I?
A: A liar.

Q: Why did the cow jump over the moon?
A: Because the farmer had cold hands.


Porn plays behind Swedish news anchor
STOCKHOLM, Sweden - A Swedish news channel said precautions are being taken after a pornographic film became part of a news broadcast. Viewers of TV4 News, a 24-hour news station, said they noticed a pornographic film playing on a TV screen behind the anchor Monday morning while he was interviewing a correspondent in Moscow about Syrian President Bashar Assad's weekend speech, The reported Monday. TV4 news editor Andreas Haglind said the 10-minute porn problem was likely related to a computer server in the studio connected to other networks operated by C More Entertainment, which owns TV4 News as well as networks broadcasting erotic content. "It's not like we were directly broadcasting porn," he told the Swedish-language Expressen newspaper. "Put simply, it's crap that it happened. We're going to do everything we can so that it doesn't happen again."
His job is to grab attention, and he's a master at it! Nonstop (Marquese Scott) collaborated with this sign flipper to bring us a video celebrating their mad skills. -via Holy Kaw!
Check out more amazing talents over at our Mad Skills blog
These cats find it hard to share one bowl. Still, they are rather civil about it. Such situations often involve growling, slapping, and hissing. -via Daily Picks and Flicks
Conjoined Jeep
conjoined jeep
Sorcery! What wicked magic spawned this abomination?! According to internet rumor, this Jeep Wrangler is owned by a diplomat living in Rabat, Morocco. It's not Photoshopped. At the link, you can watch a video of it driving down the road.

Beer lover designs brew for dogs
BEND, Ore. - An Oregon man said he combined his love of beer with his love for his dog to create a successful product -- Dog Grog. Daniel Keeton of Bend, who works at the Boneyard Brewery's tasting room, said he designed the non-alcoholic brew for his dog, Lola Jane, and decided to market the product when he saw how much she enjoyed the concoction, KTVZ, Bend, reported Monday. Keeton said his Dog Grog is made from low-sodium vegetable broth, water, spent grain from Boneyard Brewery and glucosamine. He started bottling and selling the brew in July and his wares are now sold at Visit Bend and Muddy Paw's retail stores. "Two things that have become part of the Bend lifestyle are beer and dogs," Visit Bend chief executive officer Doug LaPlaca said. "So to create something that would take advantage of the two we thought was a brilliant idea." Keeton said he recommends serving Dog Grog as a treat on its own or pouring it over some dry dog food. However, he said there are other ways to serve it. "A couple of my friends who just acquired a puppy are making ice cubes out of it, and it's helping the puppy with teething," Keeton said.
He doesn't know how thin the ice is, and he doesn't care. I don't have any information on this vehicle, but it's apparently a real all-terrain vehicle, with "terrain" including water. Pretty lightweight, with oversized tires that are basically flotation devices. -via Daily Picks and Flicks
This would have been deadly if it had worked: In 1862, Confederate private John Gilleland of Georgia's Mitchell Thunderbolts designed a double-barreled cannon. Gilleland intended that the barrels would fire two balls connected by a chain that would "mow down the enemy somewhat as a scythe cuts wheat."
Unfortunately he couldn't devise a way to fire both muzzles at the same instant, so in testing the chain simply snapped and sent both balls off on unpredictable trajectories. The cannon was never used in battle, and today it's displayed as a curiosity before the city hall in Athens, Ga.

Another puzzle by Lewis Carroll:
In a group of soldiers, if 70 percent have lost an eye, 75 percent an ear, 80 percent an arm, 85 percent a leg, what percentage, at least, must have lost all four?
Ten. "Adding the wounds together, we get 70 + 75 + 80 + 85 = 310, among 100 men; which gives 3 to each, and 4 to 10 men. Therefore the least percentage is 10."

A family has two children, and you know that at least one of them is a boy. What is the probability that both are boys? There are four possibilities altogether (boy-boy, boy-girl, girl-boy, and girl-girl), and we can eliminate the last, so it would seem that the answer is 1/3.
But now suppose you visit a family that you know has two children, and that a boy comes into the room. What is the probability that both children are boys? Of the two children, you know that this one is a boy, and there is a probability of 1/2 that the other is a boy. So it seems that there is a probability of 1/2 that both are boys.
How can this be? We seem to have the same amount of information in both cases. Why does it lead us to two different conclusions?


How Fast Could You Travel Across the United States in 1800? • 19 hours ago • 3
Thomas Jefferson imagined that what is now the continental United States would consist of three independent nations: from the Atlantic to the Mississippi River, from the Mississippi River to the Rocky Mountains and from the Rocky Mountains to the Pacific.
Well, of course, he did. When Jefferson died, railroads and electrical telegraphy were in their infancy. Almost all of the United States was a wilderness. Traversing, let along communicating across the vast continent was a monumental task.
In his 1932 Atlas of the Historical Geography of the United States, the distinguished historian Charles O. Paullin showed how long it took to travel across the country from New York City. Look through his maps for 1800, 1830, 1857 and 1930.
Get that Maker's Mark fancy-pants stuff out of here, after a tough day there is nothing that beats some good old Jack Daniel's Whiskey. Well maybe there is but for the purpose of this post there isn't. Beyond that, reproposed wood is also about the coolest thing since sliced bread. It can even be made into all like these handy dandy Jack Daniel's American White oak rings.
Abraham and David Roentgen were master craftsmen, famous throughout Europe as makers of furniture and mechanical marvels. This desk contains a musical clock and dozens of small chests, drawers and pockets recessed seemlessly into the woodwork, accessible only by pushing hidden buttons.
The best Maxine in quite a while.

As we progress into 2013, I want to thank you for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally screwed up now and have little chance of recovery.

I can no longer open a bathroom door without using a paper towel, nor let the waitress put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.

I can't sit down on a hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.

I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking one's nose.

Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.

I can't touch any woman's handbag for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public toilet.

I must send my special thanks for the email about rat poo in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.

ALSO, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

I can't have a drink in a bar because I fear I'll wake up in a bathtub full of ice with my kidneys gone.

I can't eat at KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes, feet or feathers.

I can't use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

Thanks to you I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

Because of your concern , I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer buy fuel without taking someone along to watch the car, so a serial killer doesn't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.

I no longer use Cling Wrap in the microwave because it causes seven different types of cancer.

And thanks for letting me know I can't boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face, disfiguring me for life.

I no longer go to the cinema because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS when I sit down.

I no longer go to shopping centers because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me..

And I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a huge phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore and Uzbekistan ..

Thanks to you I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big black snake could be lurking under the seat and cause me instant death when it bites my butt.

And thanks to your great advice I can't ever pick up a dime coin dropped in the car park because it was probably placed there by a sex molester waiting to grab me as I bend over.

I can't do any gardening because I'm afraid I'll get bitten by the Violin Spider and my hand will fall off.

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 p.m. tomorrow afternoon, and the fleas from 120 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbors ex mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's best friend's beautician!

Oh, and by the way...

A scientist , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.

P. S. I now keep my toothbrush in the living room, because I was told by e-mail that water splashes over 6 ft. out of the toilet

Thanks, Phlax
Inside Job
Those kids will grow-up fatherless, uncared for emotionally and financially, and will become behavior problems and miscreants of society.  This woman is a breeder, not a parent. She should have been sterilized after one

Pain Relieving Coconut Oil Arnica Salve Recipe :)

Coconut Oil Arnica Salve

2 cups coconut oil

.6 ounces dried arnica montana flowers

½ cup beeswax granules (scant)

¼ tsp. peppermint essential oil (optional)

¼ tsp. lavender essential oil (optional)

Coconut Oil Arnica Cayenne Salve

2 cups coconut oil

.6 ounces dried arnica montana flowers

3-6 tbsp. dried cayenne powder

½ cup beeswax granules (scant)

½ tsp. rosemary essential oil (optional)

Tools Needed:

A double boiler or crock pot

Cheesecloth, old cotton t-shirt or cotton pillowcase

Bowl, Mason jar, etc.



1. Since you are using dried arnica, you will get best results if you can allow the arnica flowers to steep in the coconut oil for 12-24 hours. I used a double boiler and kept my stove on the lowest setting possible. Some people prefer a crock pot, and using this method will allow you to let the herbs steep for a longer period of time.

2. When you first get the arnica, whiz it gently in a food processor to start bruising the flowers. You could also use your hands to crunch the flowers up. This will help the flowers start to break down and make the infusion of arnica happen a little faster.

3. Place the dried arnica into your double boiler or crock pot. If you are making the cayenne salve, add the cayenne to the arnica at this time.

4. Pour two cups of coconut oil over the arnica (and cayenne, if applicable) and stir to ensure that all of the flowers are completely submerged in the oil. You don’t want any leaves sticking out.

5. Cover and let infuse on low heat (warm setting on the crock pot) for 12-24 hours. You can stir it every so often if you desire. Keep an eye on it to make sure all of the arnica stays submerged and also to ensure that it doesn’t get too hot.

6. When the allotted time has passed, turn off the burner or crock pot and let the mixture cool for an hour or so. You don’t want it to completely cool, as the coconut oil could start to solidify (depending on where you live), but you want it to be cool enough that you don’t burn yourself.

7. Place your cheesecloth, t-shirt, or pillowcase over your bowl, jar, or measuring cup. Carefully pour the coconut oil into the cheesecloth and let the mixture drain into the bowl below. If it’s not too hot, you can pick up the cheesecloth and squeeze the oil through the fabric to speed up the process.

8. Once you have strained out the herbs, you can place the filtered oil back into your double boiler. Make sure you wipe out the double boiler to make sure there are no clumps of herbs left in there. Turn the heat on low.

9. Add your beeswax and whisk until completely dissolved. The scant ½ cup of beeswax will yield a very soft salve. If you want it firmer, you can add more; softer, you can add less. You can test the texture by dipping the back of a metal spoon into the mix and then allowing to cool and applying to your skin.

10. Once the beeswax is melted, remove from heat and let cool for about 30-60 minutes. Stir in your essential oils and then pour into whatever containers you desire.

11. Use the salve on tired, aching muscles, bruises, sprains, arthritis, etc. NOTE: for the cayenne salve, use caution when applying and avoid applying to your face. If you are concerned with pepper residue on your hands after applying, you could also use gloves, or apply with a spool or small spatula. I personally use a spoon.
"}'Like ·
Fellow Golfers,

Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing.

When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either use one more club or two more balls.

If you're afraid a full shot might reach the green while the foursome ahead of you is still putting out, y
ou have two options: you can immediately shank a lay-up or you can wait until the green is clear and
top a ball halfway there.

The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant elimination of the one critical
unconscious motion that allowed you to compensate for all of your many other errors.

Everyone replaces his divot after a perfect approach shot.

It is surprisingly easy to hole a 30-foot putt. For a 10.

It's not a gimme if you're still away.

You can hit a two-acre fairway 10% of the time and a two inch branch 90% of the time.

Every time a golfer makes a birdie, he must subsequently make two double bogeys to restore the
fundamental equilibrium of the universe.

Hazards attract; fairways repel.

A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.

A good drive on the 18th hole has stopped many a golfer from giving up the game.

Golf is the perfect thing to do on Sunday because you spend longer praying
than you would do in church.

A good golf partner is one who's always slightly worse than you are....
that's why I get so many calls to play with friends.

If there's a storm rolling in, you'll be having the game of your life.

It takes longer to learn to be a good golfer than it does to become a brain surgeon.
On the other hand, you don't get to ride around on a cart, drink beer,
and eat hot dogs when you are performing brain surgery!!!

Dance Alcohol Test Gag

Homemade Toothpaste

Here is a quick tutorial for homemade toothpaste, and I say quick because it really is, it only takes a few minutes. All mesurements are approximent, just adjust to suit your own tastes.

2 cups VIRGIN ORGANIC coconut oil
1/4 cup baking soda
20 drops peppermint oil (or any oil of choice)
Stevia (optional)
Spoon the coconut oil into a bowl and give it a quick stir to soften a bit.
Add baking soda, and stir until smooth and well blended.
Add as much peppermint oil as you would like.
Store in air tight glass jars and use as you would regular toothpaste
Monday, January 7, 2013
Nikola Tesla died on this day in 1943. Tesla is considered America's greatest electrical engineer, credited with inventing radio, and for whom the tesla (unit of magnetic flux density) is named. The impact of his work is felt by everyone, every single day.

Random Facts:

Sometimes known as the father of modern electricity, Nikola Tesla was a Croatian-born immigrant who revolutionized the production and transmission of electricity with his alternating current motor and systems. Up until around 1900 electricity was dominated by Thomas Edison's direct current systems.

Noted for making incredible claims, Tesla claimed that he invented a death ray that could send concentrated beams of energy through air with the capability of bringing down a fleet of 10,000 enemy airplanes at a distance of 250 miles. He believed his death ray, if it were ever accomplished, would end war as we know it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Each man that Miss Jones chose to wed with,
She first liked to paint the town red with,
For having made merry,
She then became very
Aroused and fantastic in bed with.
You know that Hostess Bakery plants shut down due to a workers' strike.
But you may not have heard how it was split up.
The State Department hired all the Twinkies,
Secret Service hired all the Ho-Hos,
Generals are sleeping with the Cupcakes
and Voters sent all the Ding Dongs to Congress.
Two nuns go to a restaurant to have dinner. They notice Rocky
Mountain Oysters on the menu and wondered what that was.
They ask the waiter who replies "Oh Sister, those are nuts."
She answers "Do you mean like the kind you crack with a rock?"
"No. The kind you rock on a crack."


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